Happy new year

It's like 11:20pm here so happy new year to you guys back in Singapore in 3 hours 40 minutes time! I totally forgot that today is New Year's Eve until Alex told me. Sure doesn't feel like New Year's Eve to me. Honestly, it just feels like any other day. I am no longer feeling the magic of holidays.

Anyway,

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

11:20pm

Champagne Supernova

Went to some train called Puffing Billy today. It's basically just a steam train but you get to seat right on the edge of the window when it's moving. It was very cold as the wind would be blowing against you but I guess it was fun. Didn't take much photos today though.

I had quite alot of alcohol today cause we went to various wineries. I wouldn't say that wine isn't nice to drink it's just that I would rather drink juice then wine. We really got to taste so many different varieties. I guess my favorite one would be the Moscato (Thanks Kym for reminding me!) as it's slightly sweeter. We tasted sparkling wine too which was ok.

Really didn't do anything worth blogging after that.

Back in Singapore I was really a procrastinator. I don't know if I would be one now but I'm trying not to be one. Procrastination was something that I would do every single day. I would do my homework late, study for tests the day before and stuff like that. I really hope I can change that point about me cause if I procrastinate here my results would definitely be below par. Please pray for me with regards to that ok?

I'll try to keep my posts longer in the future but for now I gotta go. If I'm not wrong there will be a city tour tomorrow.

10:30pm

The wind blows

This few days is super windy!! Today was free & easy which means I got to wake up later which was good considering I've been sleeping for less than 6 hours a day for the past few days.

Let's see what I did today.. Went to Hungry Jack's for breakfast. It's actually Burger King with another name. I see Whoppers on the menu. Anyway after breakfast, went to NAB (It's an Australian bank) to set up a bank account. The interest per annum 5% per year which is quite alot as compared to Singapore.

Really didn't do anything much today. We went to Queen Victoria Market which was closed at 4pm. I guess that the highlight of today was that I got an iPhone! They sell it contractless here! I got the white color model. The only bad part is that I've got to pay $120 to unlock it so I can use it in Singapore. I must remember to Gmask it in Singapore.

Gotta sleep already cause tomorrow there is some tour and I've got to wake up at 6am. See you soon =]

Connections are more dangerous than lies

l

Ok, actually this is like the 7.30pm sky! Bright?



The Caesar Salad was super nice!




This photo was taken in Vietnam! Wow, I really had alot of fun there. Of course that's another one of Jerome's talents, golfing.



This was the theme park I was talking about, you get the idea?



If I'm not wrong this is another picture of London Bridge



London Bridge



I remember studying this in Geography but I forgot what it's called already



This was taken at Great Ocean Road, I love that place!



Nice?



At around 7pm the sky looks something like this, maybe slightly darker

Well, uploaded some of the many photos that I have on hand. It really takes a long time to upload. Anyway, today was a tiring day. Tour was from 8am-9pm. We went to the Grampians National Park! I'll upload the photos of there at a later date. I enjoyed the trip because we were among nature the whole day. Kind of reminded me of Sabah minus the humidity. Can you imagine it? It's a really nice place and only photos can describe it.

On the coach today I dozed off and had this dream of Alex and Jerome. It was pretty random. I was in Singapore and we went to some hotel lobby to transfer money to Joanna then I was running after some bus while the 2 of them were on it. Random right? My dreams are really really random!

Life in Australia is becoming pretty normal for me. I think adapting to the pace of life here won't be much of a problem as it's not as fast paced as compared to Singapore. I'll blog again soon but I just want to ask for prayer requests? Can you please pray that I'll be able to fully commit my studies to God and that I'll be blessed with wisdom and most importantly DISCIPLINE throughout this period? Thanks alot! =] See you all soon!

Boston...

Damn.. I can't seem to upload photos cause the upload rate at night is so slow. Anyway, yesterday I went to the Great Ocean Road. I must say that I had alot of fun yesterday. The sights that I saw yesterday was super good. Jerome, you and your SLR will own the place upside down. Just look at his abundant talents. Soccer, guitar, piano now photography? What's next from you? Haha. I really hope I can upload the photos soon though. Anyway yesterday was a pretty long day. It lasted from like 8am-8pm. There's really nothing I feel like blogging about yesterday because pictures speak louder than a thousand words. Haha! Basically I went to the 12 Apostles, London Bridge and some other places.

Today we went to Soverign Hill. It's like some theme park. Not exactly those kind of theme park that you would imagine but it's based on the mining industry of Australia in the past. Honestly, there was nothnig much to do there but it was still fun cause some of the attractions were fun and there was this pretty girl too. The people there are really beautiful. Of course I don't go to the extent of lusting but I really find them beautiful. Of course the Singaporean girls are pretty too but in a different way. This trip has allowed me to be closer to my cousin too. She is doing her degree right now so I can really seek advice from her.

I went jogging today!! It's really nice jogging here cause it's not too hot and the wind keeps blowing against you. If I continue the way I am now without exercising I would definitely coming back a fatter person.

Yay! I'm almost halfway through Destined to Reign already. It's a really good book and you should go grab it at a bookstore. It's by Pastor Prince of New Creation. Thanks Jerome for introducing me the book. Alex, I'll read the book when they new year starts so I'll be following it accordingly.

When I was in FCBC I really believed in their teachings totally but after reading the book I realised that thought it may not be wrong it's not the best. Read the book and it'll change everything. Trust me, I've only read half and it has helped me so much already.

Had Vietnamese food in the city for dinner. The next time I come back to Singapore I'll try to get some really nice doughnuts for you guys. Alex don't drool!! (:

1 question I really want to find the answer to is 'Why am I wearing the cross?" Before I left, some friends gave me a cross to wear and I really treasure it alot, maybe for the wrong reasons. I am definitely not wearing it as a fashion accessory cause I'm not a fan of those kind of stuff. I really don't know why I am wearing it and I wanna find the answer out so I'm definitely going to find some time to reflect on it.

Oh and my new number is +6132383188! Save it if you want to k? Thanks! If possible I'll put up some photos tomorrow. Yay! Today I managed to talk to a few people! Christabel, Edmund, Jerome and Wen Zhao. 'It only 4 days since you left but it feels like so long already.' That's so true, it definitely feels like I've been here for a long long time today. Alright, see you soon. =]

11:30pm

Have a nice day

Today was pretty fun. Took quite alot of photos so I'll blog about today another day when Optus finally activates my broadband. It's like 12.35am here and those that I wanna talk to aren't online!!

I'll blog some stuff about my walk next time to. Today's gonna just be surfing around the web since it's so late already.

With You

You know what I should be doing? Instead of thinking about what's gonna happen in a few days time I should just make full use of today. I only have 7 minutes plus to blog now unless I pay another 2 bucks. I mean all I've been thinking about it what is going to happen when my family leaves Australia and how I'm going to survive alone. I barely know how to wash my own clothes so it really makes me wonder what life is going to be like in the near future. However, I should really be trying to spend and enjoy my time here with my family while we still have the time with each other.

I got my Australian number already so unless I'm in Singapore I won't be using my Singapore sim card so you can sms or call me at (I'll edit this next time once I remember the number). Oh wells, I really hope I get my internet soon too. I just got some wireless broadband router which sadly hasn't been activated yet or I'll be in my hotel room blogging instead of wondering if people are peering right behind my shoulder which my cousin just did..

Again, nothing much happened today. Went back to the city for some shopping and food. There will be tour tomorrow though, if I'm not wrong it will be some ocean walk which should be fun. Gotta wake up real early tomorrow. I only have like 1 min 50 seconds left!! I tihnk I'll just top it up, hold on.

Ok, I'm back. I really have nothing much to blog about today. I really wish I would be able to upload pictures. Hopefully the company activates my mobile broadband tomorrow. Anyway, life here in Australia seems pretty different. There's definitely alot more walking as compared to Singapore and instead of buses they mostly use trams. Lifestyle cost here is definitely more expensive too.

I'm definitely not feeling as sad as yesterday but neither am I feeling happy today. I'm seriously missing my friends alot. I would say I treasure my friends more than my extended family. Is this natural? I guess this is because I spend more time with my friends.

Some stuff I really want to do before my school term starts

1) Commit my studies to God
2) Prepare myself to devote more time to God

Ok, better I shall think of some new year resolutions to put before the year comes to an end.

1) Stop smoking.. (Kidding! Lol)
2) Study hard and achieve at least a score of 98% for my final result at the end of the year (It's really possible although it might sound impossible)
3) Really build up my relationship with God (I'm not saying that I'll be going church every week though it'll be good that I can go)
4) Chat/Video conference with my friends at least once a week
5) Build closer bonds with my family (This might be hard as I won't physically be with them)
6) Enjoy each moment possible with my friends when I'm back in Singapore

Right now I really believe that with God anything is possible. I remember Jerome's father telling me that whenever I have problems I should just commit it to God because that's the best solution. It's a totally different case on my end. Whenever I have a problem I think of ways to solve them and going to God is usually the 3rd or 4th thing I would tihnk of doing. I really have to change that and just learn to commit stuff to God.

Guys! I don't see you all online whenever I come online! The time difference here is like 3 hours earlier so I hope we can meet online soon.

10:18pm

First day here

Alright, today is like my first day in Melbourne. I must say that it's much colder than I had expected. Today's temperature was about 17 degres celcius which was pretty shocking for me considering that it's summer right now. I'm at the hotel lobby right now as internet access in the room is charged at 55 cents per minute but at the lobby it's like $2 for 15 minutes. The plane ride was pretty boring.. I was expecting them to show Twilight but they didn't so I ended up watching The Dark Knight. It's a nice show but too bad I didn't watch it in the cinema!! (:

Touched down at about 10am Australian time and we checked into the hotel immediately before heading to check my hostel out. I won't say that my hostel is good but it's decent and I'll put pictures up when I can. It really sucks to not have your own internet man. That's something I really take for granted. Almost all the shops were closed today!! During Christmas in Singapore, all the stores are open whereas in Australia most are closed except for those in China Town so on our first day in Australia I had 2 chinese meals. Feeling pretty tired today after the plane ride and all. I'm going to sleep now. The time difference here is 3 hours faster than Singapore! I'll blog more tomorrow if I get the chace to use the computer.

Honestly I'm feeling pretty down but I'm really trying my best to hide it from my family. Just knowing that I won't be going back to Singapore anytime soon is pretty depressing. I seriously miss all my friends. I really feel quite emo to the point where I may just cry. (I said before, I cry easily) I really can't wait for the chance to be able to head back to Singapore! Once my family heads back to Singapore, life's going to get pretty lonely.

I've got a few messages for some people.

Firstly Alex! I got your message today but I wasn't able to see it. Apparently my phone has some problem now, even the touch screen isn't working. So can you tell me what the message was about the next time we talk? It was like they show Alex Yan sent you a message but in my inbox there is no message.

Now Jerome! I've starting reading the book already! Thanks for it. I can really feel that something in me deep inside is changing. I know that if I don't make the effort to get closer to God things aren't going to be easy so I'm trying. (:

To you! (You know who you are) We never meant for things to turn out this way I know but I believe that God didn't let this happen for nothing. I truly love you as a friend and just the thought that I've hurt you eats me up inside. I know you'll say don't feel bad but I really do feel bad. You don't deserve to feel like this. You deserve someone who will make you happy and who can give you what you want. Don't feel sad when you read this ok? I've got this feeling that we'll be friends for a long long time.

Alden! I heard that you had a hard time choosing the cross for me! Wow, I must say that I was pretty shocked to recieve such a gift but I'm really happy. I remember in the past I always wanted to get one but I never dared to ask my mum to get me one. I've got no idea why. Just by wearing the cross makes me feel different. It makes me remeber that there is someone REAL up there caring for me. Thanks for the gift! And of course the 2 of you who contributed as well. (I know who you are) =]

I'm really happy that my friends sent me off. I'm really blessed to have friends like you all and thanks for coming yesterday, you guys and gal really touched my heart. Thank goodness I prepared myself or I may have cried. Thanks for the gifts.

I remember saying that I'll blog something about myself once I'm in Australia? I'll do that soon ok? And please don't be afraid to tag my blog when you read it ok? I really wanna hear from you guys. I just spent 4 bucks on internet and looks like now I only have about 7 minutes left. I really love all of you guys and you guys are almost always on my mind. Yes, all of you. I'll try to blog soon so see you! (:

11:40pm

Fly away

Alright, my flight leaves in about 5 hours 40 minutes. Today, was a great day. I sort of spent my day with Alex, Jerome and Wen Zhao which was very fun for me. I've got nothing much to blog about in the sense that I don't really feel like blogging right now.

Anyway, my family would be going to Australia for holiday with me too so it won't be that bad. It's the part when they leave when everything truly begins. I honestly don't feel like I'm going on holiday and tomorrow sure doesn't feel like Christmas to me, just feels like any other day. I may not be updating for a few days so see you soon!

Sometimes you can't make it on your own

It's really amazing how fast time can pass by. Wow, today would be like the last day in a long time that I'll be lying down on my bed. Feeling pretty emo already, I really can't imagine life without my family and friends. Couldn't time go by slower??

Anyway today was a pretty long day. Went to Plaza Sing in the afternoon with Alex, Caleb and Jerome. Spent most of the time at Spotlight getting Christmas presents. I'm definitely going to miss Alex and Jerome gaying around with each other and trying to outsmart each other all the time. This really sucks.. I can feel the emo crawling on to me. Anyway, went to Telok Blangah after that with the exception of Caleb who went back to school for CCA.

Another thing I'm going to miss is the soccer at Telok Blangah!! Really enjoyed soccer today and had alot of fun especially during the last match. After that, Alex and Deric came over to bathe then Alex and I headed to Queensway first. Finally got a jacket! Was supposed to meet like Deric, Jerome, Edmund, Leroy and Yong Soo at Plaza Sing for Twilight at 940pm but we all came late so in the end we just walked around pretty much aimlessly. The bus ride to Plaza Sing with Alex was damn funny. We stopped earlier because the traffic jam was so so bad. Had dinner at Pasta Mania after that. Went home after that.. I got some pictures and I'll try to put them up tomorrow.

1 thing I've learnt is that the grass is always greener on the other side. No matter which path you take you'll definitely be bound to look back and wonder if you've made the right choices in life.

Part 2

Can you imagine someone just giving you 10 grand just like that? It's quite crazy right but I just saw it happening a few days ago. The guy couldn't even believe it! Well, today after we woke up and after Jerome and Alex were done messing we went to West Coast Plaza for lunch. Hard to imagine that a place like this was once known as Ginza Plaza! Ginza was so run down and ugly. They really revamped the place already. I used to cut my hair there! Anyway, we ate NYNY. This few days my appetite seems to be not as good as before. I have no idea why.

I've finally started packing my luggage!! Yay!! I hope I don't forget anything important. I'm definitely not done with the packing but at least I'm almost half way through. My mum finally learnt how to use MSN. Had to go to her office at night to help her fix the webcam and teach her how to use it. Dinner after that.

I don't know if I've blogged about this but 1 of the things I learnt is that your relationship with God isn't based on whether you go church or not but based on you. Your relationship with God is something based on YOU and GOD, nothing else. I'm really glad to be able to comprehend this. Some of you may know but I no longer go to church and in the past I really felt that because of that my walk went off track but now I know it's because of me and there are some things I have to change about myself in that area.

The next 1 year for me will be mostly about change. We all experience change everyday but what happens when that change is really a huge change. Haha, I'm hoping that who I am doesn't change cause of that. For one, I definitely have to change my sleeping habits.

Part 1

Didn't update yesterday as I was staying over at Alden's place. Let's see, yesterday was a great day. In the morning I finally watched the sermon that Jerome lent me. It was basically about how we have the righteousness of God in us. Really great sermon, pastor Prince is seriously a really good preacher.

Alden and Alex came in the evening cause my mum wanted to buy the 2 of them plus JC dinner. It was some Japaneses buffet. After that we went over to Alden's place. Why did Arsenal draw with Liverpool!! Nooooo!! I seriously suck at bluff. I only lie when I have to and I always get caught whenever I lie.. All in all the stay over was a good experience for me since this was the first time that I stayed over at Alden's house. Hopefully they'll do this again soon when I'm back.

I'll continue what happened today later.

Never gonna be alone

The days just seem to go by faster and faster. The closer I come to leaving, the faster time passes by. Today was a fun day in the sense that I always able to spend time with my friends. Jerome came up in the late morning and we just talked and played Guitar Hero. It's a fun game and it'll be better if I had 2 guitars. Anyway, we met Alden and Alex at Queensway after that. Alden and JC were supposed to get their new boots but they didn't get it in the end. I bought some stuff and we headed down to Anfield today.

Surprisingly there were quite a number of people today. Enough to either play field soccer or at Telok Blangah. Anyway soccer was as usual, fun. We had dinner after that. We as in Alden, Alex, Caleb Wong, Deric and Jerome.

The bus ride back with Caleb and Jerome was pretty deep. Everything I say here is based on how I feel. I'm not that close to Caleb but everytime we meet there's some parts of our life that we'll be able to share with each other. Of course we don't share everything but we share and it's great to meet him again. All those that are close to him are really blessed to have him as a friend.

I have to say that being around friends feel so much different now as I know it's only a matter of time I'll be leaving. By leaving I'll be leaving so much behind which it's really quite disheartening. I really don't wanna lose contact with those I know here which is already quite a feat to do. To make matters worse is that in a way I've got to start a new life there. Ironically that's what I always thought I wanted, being able to start afresh. But I also know that I'm never gonna be alone as long as I have God. And yes, I'm going to watch the DVD tomorrow I hope!

Bella Luna (I've got no idea what it means)

I'm not a big fan of surprises but what a pleasant surprise I had in the evening. Firstly, I would really like to thank Alex and everyone else who was involved in the planning of it. I'm really touched by you all and those who came. This goes out to those who came today, I'm really thankful that you took time out of your schedule to come today. It means a whole lot to me. So, Alden lured me to meet him at Commonwealth first before we headed to Kathib MRT. Alex then brought us to a park near there and it's a really nice play. Alot of recreational stuff to do there like prawn fishing, pool, paintball, various sports. The place is called Bottle Tree Park and if you have gone there you should try to go there with your friends one day. I'm pretty happy today. The friends who mean the most to me were all there. Of course all my other friends who came mean alot to me as well and I'm thankful for each and every one of you. (I really mean it) Alex, you told me that you tried to get 70+ people and you might feel disappointed that not all came but I just want to tell you that even if 3 people came I would be just as happy as I would be right now. I know you took alot of effort to plan this and I just want to say thank you! Basically most of the people there were just gaying about which is always a pleasure to watch. I've got some photos which I haven't gotten yet but I'll be posting them once I get it.

Honestly, I really want to migrate to some other country and leave Singapore. There are so many reasons why I wanna leave but just the very existence of my family and friends in Singapore really makes me want to change my mind. I'm leaving for Australia in like 4 days and I better damn well make full use of it or I know I'm going to regret it when I'm going to leave. Come to think of it, I haven't even packed my bag yet.. Better start soon! See ya! =]

The Remedy

Went out with my uncle, auntie and my brother and his friend today. We went for some Japanese buffet at Jurong Point. Couldn't eat much today though. You guys should seriously try it out. It's pretty affordable for the lunch and the spread there is good and the quality is good too. It's called Kuishin Bo. After that my uncle and auntie brought my brother and his friend to science centre and I headed home. The bus ride back was seriously long.

I had fun in the evening. Met with Alden and Alex at Bukit Batok to see some field for some soccer thing. Then we went to BK for dinner. The conversations I have with them is something that never happens for my other friends and they're really special people in my life. If my memory serves me right, the first sentence Alex said to me was I like Joy. Lame right.

Today I sort of officially left my cell group. I've been meaning to do that for such a long time already. I mean no point hanging there and nothing changes right? I'm sure that the reason why I'm still stuck here lies with me but there seems to be nothing I can do. Do you get that feeling? Ever since secondary 3, my spiritual life has been pretty stagnant. Nothing much has changed while my cell leader constantly puts in effort to try to communicate with me. He's been practically wasting his time on me. So what better way to make things better than leaving right? This might not seem right to you guys, but I definitely have other reasons for making such a decision. It may not be the right thing to do but I do not regret making such a choice. It's better that way since I don't leaving any loose ends this time round. Of course I know that the door is always open for me to go back. But I just want to start afresh in some Church where no one knows who I am.

This blog seriously needs some pictures..

1 more thing.. Sorry Alex for you know what!

Believe?

Nothing much happened today either. Went to Clementi to collect my lenses in the afternoon. Was supposed to go to SP to play soccer after that but I didn't go cause I was scared that my strain my get worse especially since I'm leaving so soon.

Being raised up in Singapore can either be seen as a damn good thing or a damn bad thing. Personally, I feel it's a bad thing but not a damn bad thing. If you're raised in Singapore then the priority in your life would definitely be education unless you really refuse to care about it. I believe that education is important but I also feel that Singapore over emphasizes on education too much. I feel that it's a bad thing to do that but in actuality it may not be that bad a thing. It has a super low failure rate of degrading our society in the sense that most of the people who are in the society would be really uncivilized. That's not a bad thing but I just feel that too many sacrifices have been made. I mean if someone is really talented in music but is raised in Singapore, he/she will most probably be a degree holder and would get a job in the future playing music only as a part time thing or as a hobby. Whereas if he/she were raised in for example America they would most probably be a full time musician. Can you imagine Taylor Swift having to study like 5 hours a day worrying about how to pass her 'A' Levels? I'll bet she practices singing and guitar like for more than 5 hours a day. Would Messi be where he is today if he had to go through our curriculum? With our system you'll only be able to produce 1 Stephanie Sun out of so many people but look at other countries. I'm not saying education is not important but just that if you're really talented at something you should be able to focus on that talent whereas if you're not really talented then go ahead and study hard. In Singapore do you get such a choice? No.. You (the one reading this) could be really talented at something but you're most probably stuck in a school still trying to work your way for that certificate that you're studying for. Are you truly happy doing what you're doing? But as I said earlier the way Singapore does things is a sure way of making the country progress which is ok in the eyes of many but not that ok in my eyes. You can see this with your own eyes. In America there are so many people talented in singing like all those singers you see. In terms of soccer, Spain, England, Argentina, Portugal all has their own set of stars. In Singapore we got Stephanie Sun (Yay... do you even listen to her?) and in terms of sports we got Lionel Lewis. I won't count the table tennis gals cause they are from a foreign land. Get what I mean?

(:

MY NEW RULE TO MY LIFE: BREAKING'S WHAT THE HEART IS FOR

Happy Endings

Nothing much happened again today. Went for physio in the morning. Can you imagine having to spend like 40 minutes a day having to stretch. Really takes up alot of time. Went for soccer in the evening at Anfield but not many people came so it was quite slack. Shucks, cause of Azan now my ear is super pain. Talking after soccer was more fun than playing itself.

Anyway, I'm pretty surprised about the things I say with regards to Christ now. Although most of the time I don't mean it I still say it. Makes me think if deep in my heart I mean all those stuff I said. It's like I don't even know why I say such stuff but it just appears in my head.

... Why did you tell him that I'm leaving... Oh my goodness...

Breakin'

Nothing much to blog about today but today is like the first time in my life I had acupuncture. Surprisingly it wasn't as painful as I had expected. I'm not really a fan of that kind of thing but it seems to help so I might be doing it again next time.

Met Alden, Alex and Jerome in the evening to catch a movie. I really wanted to watch Twilight but we ended up watching The Day The Earth Stood Still. The show was pretty ok although I wasn't really expecting anything about the environment. Haha. These will be the days that I'll be reminiscing about in Australia. The bus ride back was classic.

Running out of days

I went church today, but you can say that I didn't listen at all. The whole while I was talking to my friends or listening to music which is kind of rude to the speaker. I was pretty distracted today.

You know on the cab ride there I had a decent conversation with the taxi driver. I could really relate to him about the affairs going on in my home and he really shared quite alot with me too although at first he lied about some stuff. When I asked if he was married he was like yes and I found out he had a child who is a 17 year old guy. Then he was talking about how his son wants to go overseas to study but he had not enough money to send. Then we were talking about God and he told me how he became a Christian. He started by saying sorry I lied to you. Then he went on to tell me that his son passed away and he still has a daughter. The shit that I go through in life is nothing compared to what he is going through and I keep complaining. Thank God that the man and his family turned to Christ but look what I'm doing, my life is going on great and all I do is keep turning away.

Anyway after that Kenneth, Timothy, Tai Li and I went to Orchard. I finally got my iPod gmasked so I don't have to use the silicon case and sleeve already. After that we went to Yamaha and I finally got my guitar strap and some strings. Got a capo from Paradiz Centre too. They totally revamped the place already so now 1 part of it looks nicer. After that we bought alot of crap from Cold Storage. It's been a really long time since I met them so it was great catching up with them. I've known the since primary 5 and we've really gone through alot together. Went to JC's house after that for awhile.

You know I dare say less than 5 people know who I really am. I shall save this part for when I'm in Australia if I remember about it in the future. Anyway, I hope Chelsea wins West Ham later so they'll be on top. I'm not a Chelsea fan by the way. See ya soon!

All in the mind

Ahh.. Soccer today was so crappy for me.. Don't feeling like blogging about it..

I'm leaving for Australia in 11 days time! That's super soon. It still doesn't feel real that I'm leaving. My family would be going there for holiday for 1 week plus so I'll still have them but what will life be like when I'm there alone? Will I feel scared? It's always nice to know you have a home but I'll be so many miles away from home so how would I feel. Almost everything I hold dear to me is in Singapore so the thought that I'll be away from all this is quite insane. I guess I'll just find out over there. But when I'm there I really have to make it a point to study as hard as I can or I'll be wasting my mum's money. I know it's not going to be easy but I'll try my best. You know what I wish? I wish that after some of my friends graduate from poly that they'll be able to go Australia to study too. It's pretty impossible though but I do hope it happens. So many questions, so few answers.

God is real

Today was a great day. Had to go for physio in the morning. I just hope my injury gets better.

Did nothing till evening then was supposed to go meet Alex they all at Newton MRT at like 5.30pm but they came late.. I'm always the one waiting for people to arrive cause I always try my best to arrive on time. Anyway, the event was great! I had alot of fun eventually. It was an EYE OPENER! Haha! All the people singing are so talented. Sometimes I wish God would bless me with such talents. Anyway the message by the man today didn't really speak much to me. It was basically just reinforcement of what I already know about God.

I know God is real but somehow I just choose to ignore that fact. It's so stupid but that's what I've been doing the entire while. I'm just denying the presence of God and living the kind of life that I want to live which is really foolish. Initially I felt bad about it but as time passed by I guess I just started getting used to it and it became a norm.

Anyway yesterday was quite good too. Met Jerome in the evening and we went for supper. Had a really good talk with each other till pretty late. He's been my friend for like 11 years already and he's like a brother to me. Thank God for you.

The idea of living in Australia on my own is pretty exciting and scary. I'll blog about how I feel about that tomorrow.

201

Today I was at home the entire day but I dare say that it's one day I'll never forget. Alex, thanks for helping me with everything! You're really a great friend, someone I know I can count on ALMOST all the time. Haha! Yea, so I like took 1 hour + to write it and I'll send it off tomorrow but first I gotta buy a stamp! Good night world.

And damn, feel free to check out the archives for loads of crap! (:

Where are you

Ok, I shall blog about yesterday. So I basically got my new nano yesterday. It looks super nice but too bad the capacity is really small. It was really tough contemplating which I should buy. So in the end I decided to get this.



This part is for Alden and Alex. Yes yes, it's orange ok.. but I don't like orange for the reasons you think I do! It's just a nice bright colour!!

Then in the evening Jerome and I went to play pool with his uncle and cousin. Before that we went to Botak Jones to eat. You can never get sick of the food there. I wonder if the food in Australia would be like that. I lost every single match I played in pool. My concentration sucked and I really just suck at that game. But it was fun. Both the uncle and cousin are pro but the cousin is insanely good. He is those competition players. But yesterday Jerome won him so what does that make Jerome?? Anyway, after that he came over and just talked and played dota with the rest.

For me songs always cause me to feel the way the song is. Like, if I listen to some sad emo chinese song I would start to feel abit down and if I listen to Christian songs which I haven't been listening too for a long long time I feel at peace like nothing can knock me down. My walk with God has been on a downward spiral since secondary 3 and it's never showed much signs of improving since. It's not that I don't want to go back to church but I really don't know why I always go. I keep telling myself I'll change but I don't. The thing is I know that God will always be there waiting but I keep feeling like he's not around..

Honesty..

I feel that I should make my blog as honest as I possibly can cause to me that's what makes blogging fun and interesting for you guys to read.

I dreamt of something super random yesterday. You know Amy from Fairfield?? Ya, I dreamt of her! It was really really random. If I remember correctly she told me that she dreamt that I died before. Haha. I really have no idea how I dream of such random stuff.

Anyway, I'm going to bring a camera whenever I go out to snap some pictures. Of course not SLR like Jerome that kind but some other lousier camera. Went out with my uncle, auntie and my grandma for lunch with my family. We went to some place near Outram? The food there is not bad and if I had my camera I definitely would have snapped some shots.

After that was soccer at Telok Blangah. I still remember during secondary 3 we would always go there. Those were the days.. Last time it was always the 4a and 4c people going there to play. Today was a great day for me thanks to Alden, Jerome and Wesley. Their service was super super good and thanks for such great service! Haha! Wow, I never enjoyed soccer so much for such a long time already. In terms of soccer this year has been very bad for me cause I've been hampered by this groin injury which is still there. Apparently the injury is linked to my abdominal muscles which is quite weird. Soccer was seriously seriously fun for me except for the part where Alex tried to kill me. =]

Went to Jerome's house after that to pass back to him his soccer ball. We really talked alot today and I must admit that we have really drifted alot from last time. Anyway, really great catching up with you! =]

That's all for today I guess.

Orange Sky

Today was another meaningful day. In the late morning went out with my mum and Trevor. Went to Tiong Baruh Plaza to get some stationary for Australia and some books as well. Had lunch at Sakae Sushi. I also got a new wallet today. I think we accidentally met one of my aunties there. The lesser time I get to spend with someone the more enjoyable it is for me which is quite a sad thing. This means that while I still have time with someone I tend not to appreciate them to their fullest which kind of sucks. Anyway I've decided to get a new iPod already. The question is whether to get the classic or the nano. Haha, the tough choices we have to make in life..

Anyway brought my brother down in the evening for him to skate his scooter. It was a fun and revealing experience for me. It was like every time he nearly feel I could literally feel my heart skip a beat and feeling so worried for that moment. Never knew I felt that way about my brother. It was really really a great time of bonding for us cause we hardly spend time with each other on normal days. We played soccer with some of the neighbors too. I think he wants to play as a DM cause he is like I am an offensive defender. Haha!

Jerome.. I'm not emo, I was just kidding and you're the rock star!

...

Went for some massage thing for my leg in the afternoon with my mum. It was super painful the way the man massaged but it was good.

Wow, today was loads of fun. We played soccer at the ACS field which was good to play on and the rain was good too. It's not the normal kind of heavy downpour but more of the short shower that kind so it was very cooling. Soccer was fun but the offside stuff were super funny. I really shouldn't have played but I really just can't help myself. After that we went for dinner and I ate alot. We all ate alot actually. Most of us had second servings. Let's see.. Daniel, Alden, Alex, Yong Soo, Kenneth, Bing Hui, Heng Guang, Greggory, Deric, Mok, Cousin and some church guy? Is that all?

Haha, so tired right now..

17 things you don't know about me

1) Alden backstabbed me in sec 2 over a girl.. WTH right?
2) I trust people too easily
3) I cry damn easily if you know how to make me cry
4) I'm not into bgr or that kind of thing already and is seriously considering celibacy as an option in life (not messing)
5) I have some doubts about God right now but I still am trying to believe and go back to Him
6) All I wanna hear in a song is the acoustic guitar and a good voice, the others are extras
7) God has given me signs that I'll be alone in life
8) I just got my credit card yesterday..
9) I'm leaving Singapore to study overseas real soon
10) I got super short hair right now
11) I choose fifa over winning eleven ever since playing fifa 09
12) I like beef, chicken then fish
13) I play the guitar but I suck at it
14) I regret going poly and should have listened to those who told me to go JC from the start
15) I can't stand arrogant people but I still accept them and act like they're ok
16) I am super super super flawed in so so so many ways (quite duh actually)
17) I hate starhub..

11 points about today

Ok, I'm just gonna blog about today in point form. Feeling pretty tired right now.

1) Met Alden and Joel to study at NP
2) We went Dailyscoops with Alex after that
3) Soccer till like 9+
4) Alden is a jackass for spearing me at THAT area
5) Daniel gave me a shirt as a goodbye present
6) Alex is those kind of people who don't wish you on your birthday
7) My Garena can finally work after tweaking some of the settings
8) Cleared up quite alot of misunderstandings with someone
9) Alden sucks! Totally kidding
10) I need to make another appointment to check my groin injury out and another therapy appointment as well
11) All I need is God (This list is not ranked in order of importance)

LOL

I FEEL LIKE I CAN FLY!!!!

How to save my life

1) Try to get myself back to church
2) Get my parents to get a divorce (I know it sounds super immature of me but everyone will be better off which includes my mum, brother, i and all extended relatives whom can't stand that prick)
3) Get my groin to heal so that I can play soccer properly again
4) Get my attitude prepared for studies

Don't stay together for the kids

I hate my father! And it's not because he laid some curfew, scolded me or what I just hate the way he drags everyone around down with him. I kept convincing myself awhile back that I've stopped hating him but now I know it's not something that I'll be able to just let go in a long time. Who knows, I may never even be able to let it go. Whenever I think about all he has done it really makes my blood boil. Sometimes which is most of the time, I just wish that he would disappear. I know I definitely would be sad but at the same time it would just be for the better for the entire family.

Anyway, my grandma sort of went missing today. It was like 11am then my mum, brother and I were supposed to meet the extended family for some gathering but my auntie called to say my grandma was not at home. So my family and I went over and tried to look for her. Like after an hour plus of searching we finally found her at some stall at Tiong Baruh Market waiting for one of my other uncles to fetch her back after he closes his stall. This uncle owns some stall there. I did something bad to one of my aunties today. Went I went to her house she liked asked me why is your hair so long. So I saw that her eyes were red and immediately said why is your eyes so red. I figured that she was crying because my grandma was missing. She's really one funny joker. She's the kind of person who always lives life with regrets and I'm quite sure she knows that she hasn't been treating my grandma well even though she might not admit it. Wasn't I just an ass to do that. I sort of did that on impulse because everytime I meet her the first thing she ask is my hair. Is my hair the only conversation starter?

After that we went to Bugis for lunch and went back home. My mum hasn't been feeling well recently and if you know her, please pray for her? Thanks.

I hate this song

You know there are those days where you just feel utterly depressed and just feel like rotting away at home? Today was one of those days for me. I don't know why I'm feeling like this? Maybe cause of the stupid guilt I feel for hurting someone, or maybe it's due to the fact that I'm leaving Singapore in less than a month? It just doesn't seem real to me that I'm leaving so soon. Yea, I guess that the fact hasn't sunk into my head.



Cause nobody wants to be the last one there,
Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares,
Someone to love with my life in their hands,
There's gotta be somebody for me like that,
Cause nobody wants to do it all on their own,
And everyone wants to know the night alone,
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere,
There's gotta be somebody for me out there.

Vulnerable

So my right eye is like swollen cause of some mosquito crap. Last night I got alot of mosquito bites while sleeping. Next time it rains, I must remember to close the windows.

So today, I met Alden and Grace at Dailyscoops. How do I describe it.........

Forever

Well, yesterday was fun. Wen Zhao stayed over. He's been my friend since P5 so we always meet up during each holidays. I had lots of fun. Wen Zhao is like this friend who is from one entire different part of my life. It's really really cool to have this kind of friend. He is like this friend where I can tell him everything so easily. Hey, Alden, Alex and Jerome you are really great friends too! =]

He is the only friend whom I really enjoy playing computer games with. All my close friends are like non-gamers which sometimes really isn't too good. So we played Red Alert 3 (Red Alert 2 made us close in P6), Tekken, Guitar Hero. The fun part was Warcraft. We Dotaed with like my brother and his friends. So it was 2v4 and we owned them all. Really felt bad owning small kids in Dota. Seriously, it really feels bad to kill them. But it was real funny though. I think you can imagine? We went to Botak Jones for dinner and it was really great catching up with him.

With regards to my earlier post, I really love my brother and sorry for the profanities!

...

I hate to say this but I've got one fucking unreasonable brother. His is just fucking unreasonable. Seriously, fucking unreasonable. If you should just observe him in his natural habitat for one day, you'll notice him calling my maid 'bitch', 'fucker', 'fucking bitch' and all other sorts of profanities. It's not a one time thing and it's more of a more than 20 times per day kind of thing. He keeps saying he has no friends and I wonder why? He talks on the phone to his friend and I just can't help but observe his stupid pettiness and he gets jealous so easily and if he is not happy he just scolds fuck like nothing. He's only 11 years old and he's like that. He should just learn this simple fact of life 'Don't do to others what you don't want others to do'. Sadly, I don't think he will be getting it in the near future. He can just go around judging everyone the whole day for things they never do and just get pissed over nothing. You can just ask my aunties and uncles. His mood swings are crazy, worse than a girl and really it's impossible to tell him about his wrong doings simply because he won't accept it and he will give you that typical black face and act like he's not in the wrong and that the fact that you told him off means you're in the wrong. He is seriously spoilt to the core. I'm just so disappointed/irritated with him. Today, he was playing some game with his friend then he started scolding his friend son of a bitch and stuff like that cause of some minor problem. All I did was told him you shouldn't do that and explain to him why shouldn't he in a non screaming manner and he justs refuses to reply you. He should just get rid of his stupid pride. Like father like son, he always says my character is as asshole like as my father (which I am but in a tiny way, I admit) but he really can't see himself for who he is. His self-awareness is really like crap. Ok, I may have been the one who introduced him the 'f' word but look at him now. I seriously can't imagine him growing out of this phase. Right now I can imagine him being like this for his whole life. The good times with him are great but it always seems so short. You can never cross him and get out of it feeling at ease. You just tell him one fault of him and it's immediately your fault. I have a part to blame in who he is today but so has my mom's constantly spoiling of him and my father's negligence in his life. I guess my part to blame lies in the fact that I introduced him the 'f' word and that my behavior in my younger days were pretty unreasonable at times but I am sure I was never like him. There's no way for me to help him to learn and I guess it's up to my parents to straighten him out.

Ok, don't mind the profanities but I'm just pretty irritated.

With You

I wished God blessed me to be good at something I want to be. In other words I wish I would be blessed with a talent? I won't say what it is here but I told someone about it.

The past few days have been great. Yesterday went with Alden to Daily Scoops. It was good, haven't been there for so long already. The ice cream there is so so nice. After that went to Cold Storage to get beef jerky. Another great snack to munch on. After that he came over then we went to Jerome's place to more of talk instead of 'jam'. Anyway it was great catching up with Alden.

Today was soccer downstairs with Jerome and his family with Alden and Sheng Wei. After that it was supposed to be a movie but one of Jerome's cousins lost his EZ-Link so we didn't watch. I still had fun. Jerome and family left early so we went to Coffee Bean to hang out. I think I always say this but it's really great talking to all of them. I had fever just now, but now it's better I think.

Fever..

Oh dear.. I'm like having a fever right now. Still deciding if I should go out for the movie later. It's like 38.3 degrees..

I'm gonna blog about the past few days later.

Broken

Ok, basically I really want to grow closer to my brother. I mean he's one person I've never really been close to and when I see him sometimes I just can't believe that he's my brother. Really if there's one thing I would redo in my life it would be my relationship with him. Let's just say I wasn't the best brother to him and neither was he to me. Too bad I'm like 17 and he's like 11 this year so it's sort of hard to grow closer already. Sometimes I try to talk to him but most of the time he just pushes me away. Quite sad actually..

Anyway Alex came at night. Had fun talking and just slacking. He came to take stuff and return me stuff too. Great hanging out with him. Let's see we talked about girls, Heroes, the past, life, soccer, abit of God, and the list can go on and on. Have fun in Perth!!

That Song

When I meet the 'one', I'm gonna write a song if I can? Sounds cheesy.. Oh well, Heroes is starting to get REALLY interesting. Seriously very interesting already. For the sake of those who haven't watched it yet I won't spoil. Can't wait for the next episode.

So today I didn't go church but I watched last weeks service online so I guess it's not as bad? The service last week was really good. I should have gone. My brother's really selfish. Urgh! Nothing much happened today? I'm like using one hand to type cause I'm icing my head..

Love Story

My new favorite song for now Love Story. It's really really nice.

Today, was my cell leader's or ex cell leader's wedding which sadly I didn't go cause I had to send my brother for tuition. Lame excuse right?? So I like sent my brother for tuition and fell asleep there while waiting for him there. Read some Christian papers which I printed about healing and faith. God will heal me, I know.

My brother got a 360 today cause his results were not bad! He's becoming smart and I'm happy for him. Yesterday, played guitar with Jerome. Oh my goodness, he's super good now.

Went for some therapy thing yesterday at SGH. Ya, nothing much happened yesterday though.

Although at night went to Jerome's place. Caught up and stuff. Ya, that's good.

Goose Eggs

Ouch.. Yesterday I slipped and hit the back of my head against the floor. It's like super painful now and there is one big 'baluku' there now. That's the only highlight of yesterday..

Boring...

"Messi has claimed that either Xavi or Sergio Kun Aguero should take the award from the 30-man shortlist, while Ronaldo has plumped for himself as the most deserving nominee." What the heck right? Who do you think will win it?

Anyway, today was pretty boring. I don't know why but I keep getting headaches these days. So I napped. I think the most prominent thing that happened to me today was nothing.. Can't exactly remember.

Also, I don't think I will be opening my blog yet.. Don't feel like anymore. Like typing to the public seriously sucks.

Hello world!

Ok, so I finally unlocked my blog. There are a few reasons why I unlocked it.

1) I'm leaving for Australia on the 24th December and I wanna keep you guys updated on my life there.
2) Ok, actually there is no 2?? I'm just following my instincts.

So basically this blog has been open since like 2005 or something like that?? Haha! Amazing how long I kept it closed right. Initally it wasn't locked though. Err so yea, enjoy your time here. =]

LOL

I've got something I wanna say. I've got this friend, let's just call this friend LOL. Wow, I'm really touched by LOL. LOL gave me an Arsenal jersey for my birthday which is great and I really like it alot. The thing is LOL won't even get a jersey for LOL because LOL finds it expensive. LOL was willing to get one for me! I'm so so thankful for LOL. Words can't describe how I feel. You may or may not read this LOL but really thanks alot. You've showed me what unselfishness is and I really thank God for you. LOL, I guess sometimes I really take you for granted for what a great friend you are and I really love you, as a friend of course! =] Thanks alot for your companionship and I can't thank God enough for you.

Today was a fun day and I know it's going to make it alot harder when I leave for Australia. Met Alden, Alex and Leroy at Dover MRT and we went to some Japanese place at Jurong Point to it. The food there was fantastic! Japanese buffet and not the Sakae kind. It's real Japanese food with great quality. Window shopped after that at Jurong Point. I saw this sleek Hi-Fi Set and I really feel like getting it man!! Back to the food, Sashimi and all the Japanese food you can think of. It's like paradise for ALEX! Went to Alden's house after that to chill. It was great. We played the guitar, piano and with a guinea pig. I never imagined myself playing soccer today but oh well, life has it's surprises so we went to Anfield for soccer and here I am now blogging.

Seeya!

Just another day

Sometimes I just wish I don't know when my birthday is so I'll be surprised or something. To be honest, on all birthdays I don't expect all my contacts on my phone to be like Happy Birthday! I don't expect my good friends to send me birthday wishes but I know they will and thank God that all my close friends wished me. It means alot to me. Thanks guys!

See, my birthdays has always been like this especially if it's on a weekend. From morning to evening do my stuff and at night go for dinner at some posh place. No exception this year. I wish my birthdays were like my friends and family coming over to my place and we order pizza and just hang out.

I'll be honest again. I've collected $850 in red packet money and really thank God for that but sometimes I really wish that my family just gave me presents. Like even if it's just a soccer ball, a pair of sneakers, shirts? Or anything at all I would appreciate it so much more but all year all I get is cash cash and more cash!

To end of the day I had a big quarrel with my mum. What a way to end the day.

She is Love

You know what made my night? Arsenal winning Man U 2-1!! Wow, I was expecting Arsenal to lose but well. Not like I support them though.

Soccer at the field just now. My soccer really sucks especially my first touch on the field. It's like what the heck?? Man!! I bought my luggage today.

I really can't wait to leave. It's going to be a new chapter in my life for me to write!

Realize

I just realized how much my mind has changed over the past few months. I mean big exposure to the media has sort of changed my mind that pre-marital sex is okay which obviously is not. The media has made me think that a relationship is supposed to be based on trust and other things but there must be sex inside. I didn't even realize that's how I thought until today. In truth, for a relationship to truly succeed, it must be based and built on God. With God as a foundation on a relationship it can withstand anything. Of course I know what the right standards are now and they are of course God's standards.

All this makes me wonder of how many relationships that I have with others are truly based on God? 0!! Never really noticed that before. I'm not saying a relationship without God wouldn't be fruitful, it just won't be that fulfilling or lasting.

About my earlier post about why doesn't God heal me. I've come to realize that it just means that it's not his will. The healing may or may never come and I'm prepared for it. I read this somewhere, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed you can tell the mountain to move from here to there. This is said in the bible right? But we don't see mountains flying around moving here and there do we? This is simply because it's not God's will. So now I know that my faith isn't the thing blocking out the healing. It's almost impossible not to have even a bit of faith in all you do. To many people including myself faith is believing that something will happen. But to me faith also means hoping for the best in a situation which to many is not faith but to me it is. As I was saying, it's impossible to not have faith so the only thing blocking out the healing is God's own will which is not a bad thing but a good thing in the big picture.

Made of Honor is real nice!! Damn, I've just got this thing for romantic comedies! Today's post is full of honesty, for a change. Seeya! =]





















AND THANKS GOD FOR HEALING MY WRIST!! =]=]=] XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOOXO

Healer??

You know I've got so many injuries/conditions that are really affecting me. If I'm not wrong there are at least 4 major problems I want healing for. I've been praying for sometime now but nothing seems to be happening. I know God is real but nothing seems to be happening and all this seems to be affecting my faith that there is a God up there. I know there is a God but my belief in it seems to be dwindling.

On a lighter note, life seems much more carefree now.

So Much Time

Figured that it's time for me to update. Wow, sometimes you think you've accepted a fact and when it comes closer to you, you just realize like what the?? And it suddenly feels so real.

Reason of absence this past few weeks is partially because of laziness but partially also because I was busy on almost every night so blogging became less of a priority.

Today, I'm officially no longer a NP student. Wow, I mean I submitted my form and everything today and surrendered my card. Bye Ngee Ann. Who knows, maybe one day I'll crash your lecture. I must say, Business and Engineering are worlds apart. The people there are totally different, totally opposite and I'm thankful for that experience. I mean, I always knew that there were such people but I didn't imagine them to be so close. I feel so free now because I know I don't have to drag myself to school the next day, figure out which class to cut or go and buy MCs.

Well, the past few days have been more meaningful then the past 2 weeks added up. I remember playing soccer on Saturday, patching up with my mum, helping someone financially, enjoying classes for once. I like engineering modules but I just hate classes in general.

You know it hurts whenever I smile because it's so hard to smile.















Because my lips have been so dry recently cause of some dumb medicine. So when I smile it really hurts quite badly. HAHA! Now, I've got so much time to do the stuff that really matters to me.

I'll update more frequently.

Where did I go wrong?

Today's another sucky day. Went out for dinner with family. Came home.

Ya seriously sucky, family problems again. Thank God I have this uncle I can call anytime.

Tested & True

Wow, so much to blog about. I've been meaning to blog the past few nights but didn't really make time for it.

Yesterday watched some dumb show. Max Payne... Don't even watch it if you haven't watched it yet. I sort of forgot about what I wanted to blog about but I've been skipping alot of school..

Hmm..

Bad Day

For once, I didn't purposely not go church. Wanted to go for morning service today but my mum didn't go. As you can see my title says bad day. Quarreled with my mum in the morning over going out. This time round it was totally my fault and she's super pissed right now.

And my brother another joker who pissed me off after that in the evening. Come tell me I'm selfish, everything I do is for myself, which I don't deny. But who the hell does he think he is? Some saint? I know I'm wrong but he doesn't even know his own mistakes so what's with the judging. What a joke.

All in all, today's a bad day. Real bad.

The Damage in your Heart

You know life sucks when... Boston is on repeat on your iPod the entire day.

Yea, since this morning life has been sucking real bad for various reasons. School has been great, I think I've mentioned earlier that the lessons are really interesting. Well, but today I skipped 1 lesson. You see, my time table today is like this. 8am-12pm class. 12pm-4pm break, then 4pm-6pm class so oh well, just decided to go home instead of waiting. Haha. So this is the first lesson that I skipped. Anyway, made quite a few friends. They're really a different bunch of friends. I've never hung out with this kind of people before, makes them kind of a special bunch.

With regards to my life, I keep reminding myself that no matter how much I screw up God is all I need and he is always there. That is very true, I know. But sometimes it's really hard to keep the faith. My faith in God isn't as strong as I might want it to be. I guess this happens because of God's 'denial' of my prayers. I've been praying so hard for so many things but almost 80% of them don't get answered. I'm quite sure that my prayers aren't overboard and it's pretty simple. I know that God is just waiting for a better time to bless me with those prayers but so many thoughts creep through my mind during the wait. Sometimes it just comes to me that God doesn't exist which obviously is bad. I'm trying to change that but sometimes it's just so hard.

Well, hopefully my timetable will be changed!! That's all for today.

11:11 P.M.

School life has been rather hectic lately. I'm sure I made no mistake trying engineering out. It's really my type of course. I mean everytime I go for lessons, I sort of look forward to it. Everything I'm doing is related to maths which is really great for me. Unlike business, engineering is really very stimulative to my mind. Apart from the seriously messed up timetable it's pretty good. I appealed for a new timetable today and yes, hopefully I get it.

Pray for me? Pray for healing for me? I won't say what's wrong but trust me, there are several things. God knows what they are so just pray for me? And God would do the rest. Really please pray for me ok? I really appreciate it.

My walk is slowly going off track, hopefully when I get to church this Sunday something would be different. But seriously, it really feels good to be in engineering. It's something that I can really relate to. Made very little friends, as good as 1? Anyway, everyone in the class mostly talks in chinese and I keep hearing F here and F there and F everywhere.

Remember to pray for me ok?? Thanks! =]

Save Me

I'm in school now, on break. My timetable really sucks big time. It's really like crap man. Can't stand it. I REALLY can't stand it!! I got 2 hours of nothingness now before my next class. The worst part is that I forgot to bring my laptop charger..

Someone save me please?? I can't stand it!!

The Adventure

School starts tomorrow.. Apart from my seriously screwed up timetable everything's gonna be alright. When I say screwed up it means screwed up. If you thought ending at 5pm was late, try 6pm and it happens on 3 days! And the worst part is that school starts at 8am almost everyday! The timetable is seriously screwed up. It wasn't like that but they seriously screwed it up.

Went to morning service today. I was half asleep throughout the entire service so I didn't really listen much. Met some relatives after that at Bugis, great catching up with them.


See you all soon!

Yesterday

So went to Orchard in the morning for some check ups. It was raining cats and dogs and I had to walk in the rain at first. Thankfully at the later part I asked a stranger if she could share her umbrella with me and thank God she did.

After that met Kenneth and Timothy and we went to collect our paycheck. That's my first paycheck in my life. I earned about $94. Wow. We went to play pool after that and walked about sort of window shopping. Dinner at Ajisen. End of day.

Today

Wow, basically today was mostly spent with my dad. When I say today, I mean almost the whole of today. It's really just refreshing spending time with him. I mean for the past few years of disliking him was really pointless. I want to thank God for Vietnam cause that trip there has really enabled me to release most grudges in my heart.

My dad dropped me off an SGH in the morning. Went for the check up. Turns out it is a groin strain. So the doctor sent me for some therapy and heat treatment thing. If I'm not wrong it'll take about 2 months for it to heal. At therapy I met another fairsian there. She was there for therapy too. Dad fetched me after that to go for some poly check up. Had to do some colour vision test. After that, headed down to Ngee Ann to drop off some forms.

After that was more of just spending time with each other. Had lunch at Botak Jones after that. I'm glad my dad enjoyed the meal there. Today was his first time. Played pool after that. We played for I think 4 or 5 hours. It was really just a test of concentration for me. First part I was owning, until my form started to drop. Game ended up like 7-7 or 8-8. Not sure which one.

After that we went to Tiong Baruh for dinner. Ate at Sakae Sushi and headed down to Swensense near my mum's office for ice cream and lastly we picked my mum up and headed back home. Today was a day just getting to know my dad better and it was awesome.

I won't forget Nguyen

I'm addicted to Grey's Anatomy, seriously addicted. It's so freaking good!! Nicer than O.C, Gossip Girl and heroes!! Ok, I don't think it's better than Chuck but it's as good! Wow.

Nothing much happened today. Went to the doctor in the morning and I got referred to a specialist with regards to my injury. Supposed to go for some Debrah's thing but Grey's Anatomy sounds so much nicer than that. Anti-social as it might seem, that's me and I'm perfectly comfortable blowing an outing off as long as they don't cancel it cause of me.

My walk with God seems abit off track now. Gotta get it back on track. And now, I really feel different. In a good way of course. I feel more independent. I used to rely on friends so much and I always told them my problems which isn't a bad thing I think but for the past month I don't think I've told anyone much about my life anymore. It's like I'm learning on how to rely on God and myself.

Do you like solitude? Sometimes, actually most of the time for me I would rather be alone that's why if some of you notice, I always don't go for some outings or back out halfway. It's just me I guess. Of course whenever I'm out with my friends, I feel happy and comfortable. It's just that whenever I'm alone (which I am for about 75% of my life) I feel a different kind of happy. It's not happiness, it's another emotion which I have no name for. Well, be it being alone watching TV, playing computer or playstation or just being alone I enjoy it. I think to some people doing that too much it's really a waste of time but oh well.

Grey's Anatomy!

Ok, didn't go church today! Cause it was raining super heavily. Sounds like an excuse but it's not exactly one. And now, I'm hooked on Grey's Anatomy.. And no, I didn't skip church to watch it even though I watched it. Grey's Anatomy is SUPER GOOD!! Actually I like almost all shows except for ghost/horror. Haha.

Just came back from my ex's tutor's son first month party. He has a daughter too. Ok, that tutor is called JK. And he really helped me in my A maths. I mean, back then I was totally clueless and for O Levels I got an A1 for it. In fact he helped me for almost all my subjects. He was a source of motivation for me. Thank God for him!! The party was ok I guess? Almost exactly the same as the first party he invited me to which was for his daughter.

Went to Swensense with my family after that. The ice cream there is just heavenly. I don't know if this a good thing or bad thing but I'm so used to good food already. It's like every week I go to high class places be it hotels, restaurants all this. I guess it's another thing to be thankful for.

Bankdrafted!

Oh my gosh.. I just did some research and I think my injury might be known as Osteitis Pubis. It sounds abit wrong but from what I checked it's quite screwed up.. Click on this link! Pray for me ok?? Damn..

Well, went to Isetan today for some job thing with Kenneth and Timothy. Went to Far East for a late lunch after that. Trained down to City Hall after that and we went to Funan after that. Got The Force Unleashed! Timothy got a set of earphones as well. Met my mum after that for something after that.

From what I've read about the injury, it's seriously quite screwed up. I really have to commit it to God but sometimes I really don't have the faith to believe that I will be healed. But I really want to be healed..

Dear Jesus, I would just like to commit to you my injury. I really would just like to pray for your healing upon my groin. I'm sure you know what Osteitis Pubis and I know that you can heal me and I've been praying for your healing for a period of time already and I don't know what's blocking out that healing. Could it be my lack of faith and belief? Or could it be the sins that I have commited that have clogged up your blessings? I really have no idea what else could the cause be. But if it's the first one, I just pray that you'll just bless me with the faith and belief to know that I will be healed. If it's the second reason, I just pray for your forgiveness and I would just like to repent of my sins. If I don't know what the reason is then I just pray that you bless me with the wisdom to know what is wrong. Thanks Jesus, Amen!

Woah.. As I was at the "If I don't know what the reason is then...... what is wrong" part. The word download came to my mind.. Could it be that??

The day i scratched my gutiar...

FUDGE!! Yesterday I SCRATCHED MY GUITAR... NO.............. I hit it against the window grill while about to put it in the back. Now there is a scratch... Time to get emo..

Anyway, today's Hari Raya. Did nothing much today. Went for dinner at night? Yet another buffet. Ate till very full. Hopefully I never scratch my guitar again man..

Sleepovers

Well, didn't do much in the day today. Just stayed at home and slacked. Did I mention that my neck really hurts for I don't know what reason? Haha.

Jerome came over and chatted and played games for awhile. After that Alex and Alden came and we met Jerome at Botak Jones for dinner. Argh!! It was supposed to be no meat day today but heck.

Now at Jerome's house and they're playing moo moo. Lol, abit too tired to play. Well, blog soon! Seeya.

=]

Hah. Church today. Didn't really pay that much attention. But I sort of remember the main points. Went out after that. Shopping I guess? More of window shopping. Kind of fun, too bad most of my friends don't do that kind of thing. Oh, went out with Kenneth and Timothy. In the morning saw Jerome downstairs too. Haha.

Anyway, I sort of found the girl of my dreams. Lol! Too bad she's in California.. More specifically Chino?? Bought 2 Jason Mraz albums today. Couldn't find the thrid one. Haha, so basically this Sunday night I'm wasting my time on more PS3.. Played some guitar though.

Just another Saturday

Well, nothing much happened today. Anyway went out in the evening with my family and had dinner at some place. After that went to Orchard to walk around and stuff. Anyway, life's better now. Nothing much to blog about today.

Wow, I'm amazed by how much my spiritual walk has improved and I don't want it to suddenly go crumbling down like in the past. Right now, I feel like that's gonna happen soon. The devil maybe? Ok, most probably it's him. God, please chase him away. Or maybe it's cause I'm feeling just too tired right now. I don't know. Church tomorrow.

First time at work

Wow, long and tiring day today but meaningful.

Woke up at 6.40am. Ate a kiwi before leaving at 7.10am. Reached Orchard at 7.40am and met Kenneth and Timothy there. Wow, you know I really hope that they start going church again. It would mean alot to God and I. Anyway, met them there and we went to take our attendance. So we had to put our hand on the palm scanner to mark it down. I had a stomachache! And the queue was SO SO LONG! Really long! The moment I took my attendance I had to rush to the toilet. Moral of the story, I can't eat in the morning.

Work was an interesting experience. Anyway, we were put at 3 different 'checkpoints' so we couldn't slack with each other that much. LOL! Initially I had nothing much to do as my duty was like a tag checker which means that if any price tags are missing, I have to go and retrieve it from the place they found it. At the end of the day I ended up being a packer, mover, usher, crowd control fella, casher usher, tag checker and wrapper. The job description was just tag checker!! But it was fun. You know what?? Isetan kept their free gift stock in the male toilet and super unluckily, one of the urinals flooded and the whole place was flooded. So Timothy and I were told to clear the wet boxes up. Sick right.. It was water only I think but it still felt sick. First time I did such a thing. So we had to transfer so many goods into new boxes and shift them to the girls toilet. At 9am we then went for a briefing. The place was jam packed! I mean really really really crowded. Crazily crowded. Oh, did I mention it was some Isetan private sale which was for members only. Everything was on discount and you know the equation yourself. Singaporeans + Retarded Discounts = I don't know how to put it but you get the idea. So basically I had to usher people to the cashiers and run around like mad. It was fun though.

I guess I earned about $100 today. HAHAHA. Gonna sleep soon. Tired. Thanks God.

All I have, non I deserve

Ok, so today I got my new guitar. Haha

Did nothing much before that. In the noon first went to Swee Lee but could find nothing there. Then after that went to Plaza Singapura and found a super nice guitar. Intended to get an acoustic guitar but ended up getting a semi-acoustic guitar which hopefully I won't regret. Wow, I'm really happy for it.

The fact that I've gotten my guitar shows how much God and my mum loves me. GPA 2.2? Rejecting Him. Answering my mum back. I'm sure there's much more but which of the previous warrants me getting a new guitar. Non! Thanks God and mummy for the guitar. Ok, although I got the guitar with my savings, the fact that I've gotten approval from my mum means alot. There's SO much more God has blessed me with and I'm thankful for that too!

Lol??

I've been thinking to myself for quite a period of time this past couple of weeks. I don't have any friends that I can really count on. Yea, it's like there's no one whom I can really count on. And I know that I'm not the perfect friend either. I guess the only friend whom I can really count on is Jesus? Haha, and that's something I can always take comfort in.

Well, went to the doctor in the morning. Looks like my injury is a groin strain. Haha, anyway met Kenneth and Timothy at Isetan. The funny thing is I found this thing on my finger and I pulled it out. Turns out it was a corn and my hand just kept bleeding like mad, as in seriously like mad. For 40 minutes it was bleeding profusely. It was super painful. Anyway we went for this job briefing thing. It was quite lame. We were trying to find the Isetan office and were like totally lost. Well the briefing went pretty well. We're gonna earn $6.50 and hour for about 15 hours. Well, that's going to be my first time working so it's gonna be a new experience I guess?

Went to watch Bangkok Dangerous after that. I'm quite sure that to the others the show wasn't really that good but to me it was okay. I hardly find any movies that sucks badly except those horror/thriller stuff. I just don't like that genre. Home after that.

Haha

Today was a pretty fruitful day.

I remembered what I've learnt in church today. Oh yea, anyway I went church today. Met Kenneth and Timothy there. Well, I sort of remembered the 3 main points that were preached today.

1. Guard your heart
2. Train your character
3. Train your strength and stamina

Alot of things which the pastor preached really related to me directly today. When back straight after church for dinner today. Dinner was filling. Haha! Nothing else much to blog about though. See you soon?

Thank You

I remember once blogging that "I won't blog unless I do quiet time". You know ever since I've started doing quiet time again, my 'feel' to blog has came back again. To me it's pretty amazing.

Well, life has definitely not been a bed of roses recently but it hasn't been that bad. God has been faithful indeed. I've been putting in effort not trying to waste my time. Today I basically wasted half a day. Started watching 8 Simple Rules. Quite a funny show. In the evening played soccer with the Chua family and some of their cousins. My leg has become painful again!

Here's a story to tell. On the plane to Vietnam, I came across this show Californication. I watched it on the plane and it was really entertaining. So in Vietnam, I bought the DVD for that series. Eventually when I started watching it, I realise that this was the uncut version meaning that there is some nudity in the show. Back on the plane I watched the first episode and they really cut out alot of scenes as compared to the DVD. I really enjoy watching that show as the story is really nice and funny. The amount of nudity was like 1 minute for each episode and each episode lasts about 30 minutes. Anyway I kept watching till like the 7th episode and deep inside I felt really bad and that even if the nudity wasn't something that I was lusting over I shouldn't even be watching those kind of crap. I really felt the need to throw it away but as usual the flesh is weak. So I stopped watching since then but God sort of woke me up at 6am and I was really convicted to throw it away! And so I did. Amen! I really want to thank God for giving me the strength and wisdom to do so.

I'm gonna get a new guitar soon! And I've got about $600 to do so!! :) Seeya soon!

:|

Yesterday my day was basically spent changing courses at Ngee Ann. Played pool with Jerome and his uncle for a short while before heading off to Ngee Ann for my interview. It went okay I guess, I mean I eventually got admitted to SoE but the interviewer brought me about to their labs and talked quite abit. Well, was supposed to go out after that but due to some unfortunate circumstances it was called off, so went to Jerome's house to slack. Went home after that.

Today, Justin returned me a PS3 game and we went to play pool after that. Pool was fun I guess. Went to VivoCity and walked around quite abit. I mean we walked and walked until like 5.20pm before I realised so much time has passed. Got some stuff from Candy Empire and Justin got a magazine too. Great catching up with him.

Anyway, please pray for me? I just came down with a flu and it's really pissing me off.

Lol! Another day wasted? (I guess)

I really pray that God will take away all the bitterness from my heart towards people/events. It really feels super awful to feel bitter.

Anyway, went to Ngee Ann today to try to appeal to change course to Computer Engineering. Went for an interview in slippers cause I totally didn't know that there was supposed to be an interview today. Well, hopefully I get to make the switch. Anyway did I mention that my GPA is 2.2?? Congratulations to Jerome who attained a GPA of 3.3 too! The interview went not too bad.

Spent the rest of the day at home wasting my time.. At night went to Jerome's house and was supposed to go play pool with him, Eugene and his Uncle. In the end we didn't go so Jerome, Eugene and I played Dota. The 2 of them owned me. Well, then it was Winning Eleven with Eugene and I got beaten once again every since he found my 'weakness'. Anyway it's really fun playing Winning Eleven with him. Haha.

I've been doing quiet time again recently, I mean just conversing with God. Feels good just coming back to him. I know that if all else fails, I can always turn to him.

Vietnam!!

Just came back from Vietnam. A very meaningful trip indeed. Really had alot of fun and met lots of new people such as those on internship and some other workers there. I met this guy called Tom and he's a really really nice guy and Angel as well as she brought Eugene and I around town. Anyway, I'm going to miss every single one of them. Got to know Eugene better as a person as well. He's pretty quiet though.

Life in Vietnam was super fun. Driving buggies, playing soccer, messing around, playing Dota, SHOPPING. Shopping was great!! Bought so much stuff, shirts, shorts, DVDs, food. It's really fun shopping especially with people who enjoys shopping like Eugene. Jerome doesn't really like shopping though. Did I mention playing golf? My arms really ached because of that. We went to the gym too. Can't play soccer for 2 weeks though as my injury is pretty pain. I mean I can feel a slight pain when I walk. I'm quite sure it has gotten much worse than before. The last 2 days I talked to the internship people more and got to know them better. The food was super good, very high standard and very large in quantity. I'm quite sure I have put on some weight. There was internet there!! Cool ei??

But 1 thing I don't like about holidays is the end. It's always hard to say goodbye to the people you've met and just leaving the place was abit depressing. The resort had a great vibe and I really enjoyed it. The feeling there is much better than in Singapore. Felt pretty sad having to go back but well, it's always hard to say goodbye.

Jerome was and will always be great company during the trip. Talked quite alot during the entire trip and I'm quite sure we bonded? Yea, can't thank God enough for him. The seeds Uncle Bobby planted will flourish one day, I'm sure. It's just when it will. I'm really gonna try to recommit my life back to God and try to get my life back on track. In all I do, I have to seek God first. *Must remember*

There was sort of like a mini service there too by the way. Haha. it could have been more enriching if I had paid more attention though.

So basically I just wanna thank God for blessing me with such a great trip and such great company. (:

Cheers.

Good/Bad past few days

Day before yesterday which was 27/8/2008 I think, went to play pool and ate Botak Jones with Jerome. Pool was fun? At least today I wasn't thrashed that badly. Jerome's uncle and brother were there too. The uncle is pro for an uncle. Hah. Like really pro that kind of pro. Jerome likes it when I'm serious so I'm going to be serious when it's against JEROME. Kidding..

Then yesterday, nothing much happened.

Today was great. I mean Wall-E is SUPER GOOD! If you haven't watched it, go watch it, preferably with your girlfriend/boyfriend/domestic partner/lover or whatever you kids call those people. ;) Yes! IT'S GOOD. Today started out real bad? I mean it's like I'm not even sure why myself but I just woke up and became super moody. Really had a bad mood but as the day went by, it became better. Soccer after that. Went to Clementi first but after seeing the large crowd Alex and I went to Anfield. Soccer was fun? Yes, fun.

Maybe I should make this blog public? If only blogger had some private post function then I can lock some posts up only for the eyes of the chosen ones. Haha! And Wall-E is quite a sweet show. Quite touching from my perspective as well.

Awwwww... Listening to Westlife now! What a band right. They were my favourite band last time. I mean I bought every single album they produced and enjoyed it thoroughly! Those were the days man.. I mean like right now all my worries seem so much more 'mature' then before and it sucks. Ahh..

I know I would never commit suicide. Fine, not know but I'm quite certain. But the thing is, if commiting suicide wouldn't send me on a one way trip to hell I have this feeling that I would have done it. Which leads to the question Jerome brought up. Am I doing that to escape or to be with God. Personally it's to escape!! But if I can be with God after that, why not. If only blogger had a private post function thing?? I know Livejournal has but I'm quite lazy to shift there.

Oh, and I think I'm going to quit my cellgroup. I mean I've been hanging on there for 2 years plus and it's not going anywhere. I'm literally just hanging there not progressing and it's really bad for the leaders since they have to keep worrying about me. I hope this is the right choice.

Highlight of today, I got thrashed in Dota by JJ.. Yes, and I mean thrashed. Haha. Maybe I should start playing again.

Hard to smile

Soccer at Holland V there was a total waste of time. The rain. So after soccer Alex, Alden and I went for lunch at Subway. Yeap..

For the past few days there's this burden in my heart. I don't know what it is but I can definitely feel it. Maybe it's my exam results? Maybe it's some other weird reason I don't know but it's definitely affecting my mood inside. If killing myself wouldn't bring me to hell, I would definitely consider doing that. Sometimes I just feel so tired of living, just like now. I don't know, I just feel so mentally exhausted.

See you soon!

Just another monday

Ok, I've started and finished watching Gundam 00. So many people died sadly.

Went to the doctor about my leg today. Was given some medicine and I hope it works. Supposed to abstain from soccer for now but it's hard to.

Wa.. Soccer was fun. My leg is pain so I don't know if I'll go tomorrow.

Screw the rain

I hate the rain especially when it comes when we're supposed to be playing soccer..

One thing I've learnt

Today was fun. Anyway, yesterday was the last day of my exams. Totally screwed that POA paper up big time. BIG TIME. I studied 10 minutes before leaving home. Deserve it. Hoping hard that I don't have to retake that module..

Yesterday was spent playing pool with Jerome and soccer after that at Dover. Sorry Jerome for all the crap you've been getting but something's wrong with me. And I don't mean all the stuff about church and all the talents stuff. Was just kidding about. And my aircon is fixed! Cold air coming out at last. Oh did I mention I totally crashed last night. After bathing and dinner I watched TV abit then fell asleep.

Today was meaningful and fun. Went with Jerome to help my old chinese tuition teacher fix her computer. Apparently, some virus/malware totally messed her computer up so I think that eventually the computer has to be reformatted. After that met Alex at Lido with Jerome to catch some show about englsih which was totally not what I expected. I think the title is Mad About English. It's really just some documentary which in all honesty okay, but it totally wasn't what I expected. Guys next time I'm choosing the show. Sadly Alden couldn't come or it would have been more fun. Dined at the place outside Lido. Ate Subway while the guys got LJS.

Went back home after that. Alex came over and I had a great conversation with him. Glad everything's back to before. Really found it hard to talk to him before today for a few weeks already. Looks like someone's finally getting to enjoy Winning Eleven.

And one important thing in friendship that I've learnt is initiative. If you really want to make a friendship work, you must really take the initiative or it's really going to be hard to make it work. People don't take the initiative for several reasons I guess, possibly cause of face, fear of rejection or some other reason but yes, if you want to make a friendship work you've really got to start taking the initiative even if it's one way. You know who you people are.. Quite a number of culprites lurking around here.

Yes, a proper post in a long long time. Stay tuned.

POA Test Later!

Right now it's 7.35am and and later's my poa test and guess what time I studied!? 7.20am!! Yay...

No mood

Today, I've got no mood to study and Business Law is tomorrow. Studied super little and my day was spent mostly watching shows. Yeap, I may mug like crap tonight. Maybe not though, feeling kind of tired.

You know I've got this perfect picture running in my head, not picture but more of a video and it's really like a video. Ok, doesn't make sense right?

I know this for sure. One day, I'm going to look back at my life and hate my self for doing/not doing certain things. Like not taking certain risks, leaving church and lots of other stuff.

Proud to say I've been reading a Psalm a day and maybe missed only 1, sad to say I don't remember what I read!

See you all soon! Exams ending on 21st August!!!

Thank God!

Business Management was seriously much easier than expected and the good/bad part is that I didn't even study much for it. Hopefully I'm not wrong about it being easy. Thanks God. HAHAHA.

Soccer in the evening with Jerome and Eugene. Yeap that's all for today! Exams ends soon!!

MAEC DIE!

MAEC... DIE!! Shucks, my studies are getting more and more screwed up and I'm not even doing anything about it.. Tomorrow is Business Management and I spent the whole of yesterday slacking!! Oh man.. Family went church today but I didn't go.. Err.. Update later

A Psalm A Day

A Psalm a day, that's what Jerome encouraged me to do. Thanks!!

Well, I seriously gotta thank God for Matthew YAP, not the Matthew we we've all come to LOVE. He's been helping me so so much in my macroeconomics! You'll never see this but thanks alot Matthew! Studied abit today.

Highlight of the day was sort of going to Plaza Singapura with Jerome and eating Sakae and shopping for presents. So I got for my brother an MP3 player. You know the new Creative one? Wow, it's super cool!

My walk with God is shit, (sad to say) totally non existent at all. Okay honestly, even if I do the a psalm a day, I'm not even sure if I'll remember it. Life's getting stressful!!!

Anyway I wanted to blog about Alex today. Alex's getting on my nerves!! His snobbish comments during soccer. The way he acts now.. Not that I'm perfect or what, just ranting.

Off to study now! Seeya!

People change

Ok, long time no blog! So much has happened, Sakae, pool, soccer, study, Fairfield. Ok, I'll try to put the photos soon, seriously. Anyway, it's study break now and I'm screwed for macroeconomics so... Argh... It's crazy, so much to catch up on. Ok, now I regret slacking the past few days.

Any last Friday was Sakae and soccer.

Sunday was the community shield thing with Manchester United and Portsmouth playing and Man United winning on penalties.

Yesterday which was Monday was spent studying with Alden and going to Queensway after that to get my new soccer shoe! And I sold my the other soccer shoe to Azan. He's going to pay me in 3 weeks time.

Anyway, really no time to blog and I promise I'll update soon. Yeap. Seeya!

Sweet dream

Ok, I dreamt of Rayna. Lol.

Anyway, went to school today for Macroeconomics extra tutorial. Those who didn't do the work weren't actually supposed to go in but the teacher didn't really do that. She's nice. I did the work halfway only. And today the teacher kept picking on me.

Anyway, I dreamt we went for dinner. Haha.

Nap Dreams

Well, usually I regret taking naps after I wake up but this nap was different.

*edit*

Ok.. I just remembered I posted an empty post while I was half asleep yesterday. LOL.

Founder's Day Dinner

Today was meaningful, 120th Founder's Day Dinner, alcohol, emo songs and friends

Studied in the morning. Well then basically slacked till Founder's Day dinner at Swissotel. Wore quite formally today. Tie, blazer, long sleeve collar shirt, working shoes. And Alden came over first. Anyway dinner was great, food was ok but company was great. All this while I though I've gotten over Rayna but I guess not. I don't know but I keep telling people that I no longer like her but the biggest person I'm deceiving is myself (I always thought I was good at lying). Gonna upload photos soon once I get them. Oh and I cabbed home with Jerome too.

Each time I saw her was like a major rush of emotion. Lots of emotion bundled up together. Confusion, happiness, sadness, embarrassment, fear, excitement were some of the emotions that I experienced. It was like a roller coaster ride for me. Basically I was hoping something, anything would happen today but I knew nothing was going to happen. And this is the longest time that I've liked a girl, yeap around 2 and a half years? Yeap.

Talk with Jerome after that was great and enlightening. Thanks Jerome. In this world there are only 3 people I can go to whenever I'm feeling down. Jerome, Alden and Grace. Actually there used to be 4 but things change. Grace and I just get along really well? I mean we're sort of going through identical things so it's easy to relate to each other.

Talked with God too but it still feels like I'm talking to myself, but I know God's there.

Anyway, see ya soon! (: