Last night I dreamt that I was a Digimon. How lame can that get!

Ok, today was kind of slacky. (The past 5 months of my life have been.) Played Pro Evolution and started a Manchester United team on top player mode for the fun of it. (Not that I'm a supporter of them) Ok, played it for around three hours?? I didn't even realize that three hours had passed me by. Well, didn't watch any anime today. I watch Digimon Season 2. Lame right? This shows how bored I am.

In the afternoon at around four, went with Jerome and his uncle to Depot Road to play some pool. Played 8-Ball haven't gotten a chance to play 9-Ball yet. So I was like getting thrashed by the Chua family. Jerome's uncle is more pro that Jerome so you can imagine. (Ouch!) Well, after pool went to buy the Oreo vanilla drink. It's very nice and soothing to your taste buds. Then Jerome and I went to Botak Jones to buy some food home to watch the Arsenal, Liverpool match. Bought the cheese burger thing and Jerome got fish and chips. So he came to my house and watched the match and eat at the same time.

The match was not bad. Overall quite entertaining. (For me at least) Too bad Arsenal drew with Liverpool!! Really wanted Arsenal to win. Lucas, the next Gerrard? No way!! (:

After the match just talked to Jerome about the past and everything. It's really good to just look back to a certain point in our life and just laugh at how we think in the past.

Lol. I'm typing proper english!

Hopefully I'll be able to wake up tomorrow morning for church?

alright then, today was quite fun. blogging about it on the later part of this post.

ok anyway this is the first time in my life i got stood up. ok, it's not really considered stood up cause i had 2 other friends with me. ok it was disappointing especially since i consider one of the person who stood us up to be a close friend. i won't say i'm sad la.. i'm just a little bit disappointed? lol.. some might say i'm over reacting but that's how i feel lol. ok so it's like A, B, C were supposed to join D,E and F to watch a movie. A, B and C didn't turn up but that was ok. they called us 10 minutes before the movie started to tell us which i find pretty reasonable (no sarcasm intended here, seriously) anyway, i don't really care about B and C not coming because i'm not close to them. ok i sound like a total ass but i'll still go on. lol. ok but the thing was like A called us to tell us and he was like laughing while telling us that they weren't coming. this is like one of the last times we get to go out as a 'gang' (not that kind of gang!!). ya so, i could tell that this outing didn't mean much to him but it meant quite alot to me la. i was tired after soccer and jogging but i still decided to come as this would be one of the last times we could go out together.

now on a lighter note, today was a great day in all. in the morning met alex with jerome to go jogging at queenstown. as usual they did the whole 'after jog debate routine' they do this almost all of the time after jogging together. after that we went back home and played soccer downstairs. we didn't really play soccer, we just trained together. had lots of fun with them but i just can't cross today!! gonna work on that. all this memories will definitely stay with me for a long long time, most probably forever. i can still see almost everything that happened in sabah, cambodia and in school over the past few years in my life. but i'll definitely always remember jerome crossing the ball to alex and alex failing to trap it and then they will debate again. (classic scene) really appreciate this friends that i get to spend one phase of my life with and hopefully it does not end here.

anyway after 'soccer training', showered. Alex, Jerome and I then made our way to Lido to catch be kind rewind. starting part was super lame and funny. overall it was not that bad a show. quite entertaining. actually all movies to me are entertaining with the exception of horror shows. (i dislike them and try to avoid them as much as possible but sometimes a scare does help in your life) had an early dinner after the show. Jerome and I ate subway while Alex ate fried rice. (trying consciously hard to type in proper english and start names and each sentence with capital letter) ok crap, for a moment i forgot how to spell letter. argh!! I suppose today was a great time of bonding for Jerome, Alex and I. I'm sure that we'll treasure this times in time to come.

lol.. well.. today was the same as usual.. tried to bake a banana cake after alden told me about it yesterday since i had nothing better to do. well.. turned out quite nice but abit screwed up.............................. girls are bitches.... anw... slacked again till 4 then left home for anfield again.. today was not worth it to go there. as in i hardly exercised at all. ran very little as compared to other days. abit sian la. scored 1 goal. was like monday's go just that more like nani's cause i shot at the bottom left. lol. well. ok but the hate shawn association (HSA) thing is super funny.

OH YA.. when i boarded the bus to anfield, i realised my ez link card was not inside and that i left it at the pool place at depot road yesterday... lol sucks rite.. so after soccer, went by there to get it. oh and i bought the oreo vanilla drink. it's nice but they jacked the price up.................

ok... i'm gonna state 5 reasons why girls are bitches.
1)they make use of guys alot (MANY EXAMPLES)
2)they are early game heroes (like to harrass alot)
3)they cause guys their downfalls
4)majority of the cam whores are girls.

ok maybe 4 reasons la.. this is so dumb. feeling sian now anw

just played with alex and alden warcraft. moomoo.. lol..

i make it a point to exercise everyday. so it's days like this i feel screwed up cause i didn't exercise enough and i didn't exercise after that. so it's like if i don't play soccer, i will exercise at home for 30min and if i play soccer i won't exercise at home. so it's like today didn't exercise alot then i wanna exercise at home but i reached home at 8.30pm and had dinner at 8.40pm too so i cant exercise... ok this sounds dumb...

anyway, i don't know if i'm like obsessed with exercising or what lol...... ok la not obsessed lol..

feeling tired should i stay up for the arsenal liverpool match?? lol..

today's post may seem weird because i feel emotionally confused.

ok so i'm late for this post again.

well, yesterday alex wasn't late. cause he totally didn't come at all. well alden, alex and i were supposed to go to orchard. he had to fix his specs and i had to send my vaio in for servicing. (crap right) his dad gave him an errand so he could not come. lol

hmm.. so went with alden to wisma and sent my notebook in for servicing. hopefully they find the fault man.. and the lag problem does not happen again? oh ya.. met khai dan sophia christabel qilin and wen hui at wisma. they were going to watch movie.

well walked around orchard and ended up at taka. the basement there has lots of gd food. so alden and i got tako yaki first and then thought about what to eat for lunch. well, ended up eating fish and chips. the fish is much nicer than botak jones one but the chips at botak jones are nicer. much nicer. really felt like buying churros but it costed $2.50 and for just fried dough with sugar and cinnamon, it really isn't that worth it. but i can hardly find it in singapore. ok after lunch tried finding khai dan they all but they were watching the movie already so we went to depot road to play pool.

was really off form yesterday. i only played well for around 7 turns before i went back to my earlier form. yea so basically that was it for yesterday.

ok this post is 1 day late. i am writing it now but im gonna set the date posted to yesterday with some random time.

well yesterday was a great day actually. ok.. maybe not that great but not bad. well the day started off as usual. waking up late, slacking after bathing, watching tv, playing ps3, was still trying to fix my laptop yesterday but to no avail.. wth.. i just bought it la. OH YA! i started watching DIGIMON SEASON 2! LOL. lame right. just trying to enjoy the past. lol. i used to love it.

well left home at 4.15 to go to anfield! but guess what? alex said be there at 445. i reached at 440 la. i always try to reach a place 5 min early to don't screw people's lives up. but alex reached there at 5.15.. cool right. he's always late. anw yesterday may not have been his fault (so he says) BUT late is still late. up till now he's wasted more than 24 hours of my life BY BEING LATE! no one has ever been so late.. except my father la.. he's worse than alex. lol. sadly. lucky the 2 korean boys came and brought their ball so we just started kicking around while waiting for alex and alden to come. ok really clicked quite well with alden yesterday. our passes with each other really connected very well. there was this once he passed to me then i back heeled. ok it failed by abit. the ball was abit too ahead but it was really close to executing a brilliant move like those u see man u doing. really cool. ok scored 1 goal yesterday. finish wasn't that great but i really like the set up for it. the ball came from a throw in. alden passed the ball to me. did u watch the man u liverpool match where nani scored. he cut super well then went for the bottom left? yea i did something like that just that my shot landed on the top part of the net. the shot wasn't hard either but it dipped so i guess it made up for the lack of power. really gotta start working on my shot power. and sorry alden for kicking the ball to ur face man.. unintentional. OH some buddha boy came too. he's quite fat hence alot of ppl made fun of him. i really pity him man.. i hope he does not let the insults affect him.. hope he is christian too. anw tried doing the move i've been practicing with alex. the one where i cross the ball from the right side to the left. my crosses are quite ok but it's just not meant for alex as in i either kick it abit too front of him or just at him. ok, my passes are ok too just that i can't judge the pace of the person receiving the pass hence it's either too front or too slow. lol.

well at night played warcraft with alden. played some defiance open rpg thing. was quite fun but alden disconnected halfway and did not save the character so u can imagine.. lol. well gonna blog again later about today.

catch you soon!

ok.. from now on i'm gonna put the actual time and date that i blog so yea.

right now there is like this cold war in my family. my mum and i against my father. ok i have not talked to my father since i went to alden's house that day which means it has been 3 days?? lol. really got nothing to say to him at all.

well today has really been a sugary day. consumed alot of sugar stuff today like soya bean (4 cups), chin chow, tao hui, rum rasin ice cream. lol.

anw at night went to tiong with my mum and brother. sent my grand ma back on the way. tiong now has subway, ajisen, tcc coming up. cool ei.. they need to upgrade the cinema though. it's quite outdated compated to cathay and vivo those kind. lol. gonna start going church next week already HOPEFULLY! :)

this is like those mornings where you wake up from a dream and you feel super... err how to put it... love sick?? lol

ok this post shall be about the day before yesterday and yesterday which was a thursday and friday. as i said earlier i ended up going to alden's house to stay. it was a fun time of catching up with him. we did crazy stuff la. ok played winning eleven with him the ps2 version and it was quite fun. that version is super easy to dribble past or chip over keeper so it was fun. then later we ended up playing x-hero siege. we completed the whole game but there was some glitch like we started with 100k gold? lol so we could buy alot of items at the start. but we completed it la in the end. after the game alden was like "lincoln, you want to climb the roof or not? seriously". i went like what the hell la but we still did it in the end. the view was very very nice. we could see alot of stars and it was a nice view. and also the climbing down part was hard. i dirtied my shirt abit la. lol. after that slept la was quite tired if i remember correctly.

ok i'm seriously pissed off at my father la... most of the readers here already know why so i don't have to explain it here but seriously my mum and i treat my maid like family so he should honestly not treat her the way he did. utterly no respect and i'm utterly disgusted. the worst part is i talked to him nicely at first then he lost his cool but he did not shout la but i could tell he really lost his cool. he has too much pride. way too much.

ok today was not bad a day. quite good actually. morning just slacked about at home and at 12 plus alex and heng guang came over. played pro evolution with heng guang. then later went to play pool at depot road with sheng wei too. played not bad today. did some nice shots. alden came late for pool though but he still came. then took a cab to dover for soccer at heng guang's place. was really great.

ok. the first part was fun. i really sweated alot which meant that i ran alot. i guess what alex said is true la that i'm naturally defensive but i can attack too but that is because everyone else goes up and no one defends. up till now i still haven't found my best position but i'm guessing it should be right midfield, central midfield, right back and i'm not sure of this yet but support striker haven't really explored playing that position yet. there are many things i like about playing at heng guang's place. there are many nice people there gabriel, yong tsu (if that is how it's spelt, i don't know), daniel, heng guang, alex (all these are the regulars who play there la most stay in that dover area). really fun people to play with. i like it when people i know like alden, mok (when he does not mess too much) play too! i also like the court. it appears small when there are people playing in it but actually it's quite big. i saw it myself earlier when it was rather empty. stuff i don't like about playing there is when people keep saying no goal no goal when it was a goal. really gets on my nerves sometimes. well sometimes when we have to wait to play i don't really like it.

the better part was later when feng yuan and his friends came. ppl who came were chuan hao, kenneth yip, brandon, daryl and some people i do not know. but they were not bad. it was really a good match for me though. we played whoever reach 3 goals first. so first they scored then we scored then they scored again then we scored so it was like 2-2. then i scored the last goal it was a good goal cause i scored at the bottom left from like half of a half from the right side. i'm happy with myself for that. i almost celebrated la. i like ran after i scored but decided not to in the end. i really wanted to win that match. it's like those matches where u can't lose that kind so you can imagine how i felt. after that walked to the ac bus stop with alden and jun jer who was walking the same way. i felt really happy when alden and jun jer recognized my effort in the game when alden said i played like the team captain and that my goal was very nice and jun jer agreed with alden because i kept running up to attack and back to defend. well it really felt good to have ur efforts recognized by your friends so people, encourage ur friends as much as you can whenever you can. try la. it's easier to dao than to encourage. lol.

ok i played soccer for like around 4 and a half hours? really tired. when i went home after dinner, called jerome and he and his cousins went downstairs to play soccer so i brought my brother down along too and some other neighbours came as well so we could play a match. played from 8.30 to close to 10? really couldn't do much i was exhausted from such a long day already but it was fun la. i realize when u really feel the pinch from your fatigue, you will seriously under perform alot like you can't shoot properly ur passes will be screwed. everything justs becomes damn screwed up and it is very different from when you have energy. lol. you can't even dribble for nuts. lol. really really tired now. hopefully i can wake up for the morning service tomorrow and go there with my family (excluding my father he does not go church).

ok this is super abrupt. i am at like alden's house now and i'm staying over. lol. here's how it went. i quarreled with my father and it's really not my fault. he has absolutely no respect for other people and i shall elaborate on that tomorrow. even my mum agrees! so just played winning eleven with alden and now don't know what we're gonna do. use the com i guess. haha. really super pissed off with my dad. it's been a long time since my last break down with him. my last was like in secondary two or three? well, i guess things happen for a reason. i've been praying for him like everytime but nothings happening. seriously i hate waiting for things to happen! sian.. gonna blog tomorrow la and cut my hair too! seeya !

why is it whenever it comes to all this technology stuff ah i'm damn damn unlucky? there's always something wrong whenever i buy a handphone, cd, and now it's my laptop.. i just got it like a few days ago and now it has so many problems.. seriously sucks man.. and can't find out what the freaking problem is. it's really damn damn irritating. freaking freaking irritating.

well.. yesterday was quite fun. alden and alex came over to stay over again. lol. played lots of games with them and jerome too. played pro evolution, dota, xhero, moo moo, more moo moo, rainbow six. slept really late yesterday like at 5am? or maybe 4.30am? but well, had fun so it's ok and school is gonna start soon too. slept for around 4 hours only . woke up at around 9 something. then played moomoo and dota again after that.

after that, played soccer downstairs. actually we did not intend to play la but just kick the ball around and practice but some other ppl came 1hour after we played. i was running alot and it's really damn tiring. i practiced crossing to alex and alex will trap and also lots of 1 touch passing. was fun but as i said earlier, tiring. after that some other ppl came so we played. wa alex and i played very well initially lots of good passes to each other like arsenal like that. but i was too tired to play properly after that already. lol. we went to library after that alex borrowed some books, jerome at some food, and i drank some drinks. lol.

hmm.. i've done some research on universities in U.K. and if i go to that one that i'm going which is University of St. Andrews, it is 4th place in the U.K. just below oxford, cambridge and imperial college. quite cool going to such a gd school.

OK wAIT back to yesterday morning! Alex and i went to np to do our laptops and me not knowing that i should not bring another laptop for servicing, naively brought it there expected everything to go on as smoothly as last time. but NO! second day in NP and i'm labeled a cheat, thief, stealer, bad person, dishonest. cool right. i serviced my old laptop before already in NP so i brought my new one for servicing too. so they think i'm trying to steal their software and use it for my own purpose. it's really damn screwed up la, i seriously did not know i was supposed to do that. but well the other laptop is reformatted already so all the stuff is gone already. worse thing is i gotta go there again to install all the programs and stuff and BRING THE OLDER LAPTOP TO VERIFY THAT I DID NOT STEAL! what an auspicious way to start the school year.

hmm... yesterday was quite a good day. went to church in the morning with my family. service was very gd.i felt different walking out of church. then went to clementi to eat lunch. lol. then my mum went for some appointment, my dad and brother went to isetan and i went to my uncles house. he has a ps3 so i played pro evolution with him. he's not bad already compared to the last time i played with him which was during christmas. it was fun catching up with him and his family. went home and watched the liverpool man u match! nothing to say bout that match just that mascherano is abit dumb... oh and nani's goal was not bad. surprisingly, i watched the match with my father and i was not pissed off. lol

ok tomorrow alden and alex shld be staying over so it's gonna be cool.

yea & i really got to start changing.

ok today was not bad overall. alex new laptop which is less than 1 week old screwed up big time!! :D COOL EI!!!JUST KIDDING. "i must uninstall hamachi. make my com got problem" BULLSHIT LA! well, he reformated the com so he installed fm, warcraft and hamachi. lol. well, now we both gotta go back to np to install the stuff for the laptops.

Highligh of the day, i got a new laptop. as in a Brand New laptop! it's super cool. well but it came at a high price though. i bought it at $3999 which in other words, is 4k.. lol paying half of it. but my mum keeps rejecting my offer. haha. got it from funan. well it is a sony vaio. the higher end model.

hmm gonna sleep earlier today so that i will be able to join my mum for adult service tml. well.. she's gonna drive there! so it's cool.

well, it's been a pretty crazy week! ok firstly on wednesday alex and alden stayed over. was crazy. we went to play pool with jerome too (he's my neighbour) in the evening till 9plus. then when we reached home, played warcraft. dotaed first with jerome too. was fun. then played moo moo and td too. gem td is fun! it was basically just a great time of catching up with all of them and hopefully we get to do it again. "watched" the matches, man u vs bolton & chelsea vs spurszzz!! ZZZZZZZZZZZ!! ALEX KEPT CHANGING THE CHANNELS REALLY DAMN SIAN! and he said "man u that match will be goals galore" and cant remember what he said bout the spurs match. he's full of crap la. the next day man u 2 - bolton 0 & WORST OF ALL CHELSEA 4 and SPURS 4!! MISSED A FREAKINNG GOOD MATCHHHHHH!! well then after that justin came over to borrow ninja gaiden for the ps3. played rainbow six vegas with him. just like last time like that. lol. great catching up with him too! hopefully i get to meet all my friends that i've not seen for a long time!

OK MY LAPTOP SERIOUSLY SUCKS! even warcraft has choppy graphics on it!!....... SIANZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!

school's gonna start soon. looking forward to it! i really wanna make new friends and not stick to the old ones that i know. hard to explain. of course i'll still be friends with the current friends la. duh.

ok.. lol been pretty busy doing stuff. been warcrafting with alden every night till like 2am++? been crazy and fun catching up with him!!

today's family day. went out with my family today. went to coca for lunch to celebrate my grand ma's birthday. was really nice. then my bro and i went to isetan to get some stuff. then we went to holland v to go and eat hagen daz if that's how you spell it. lol. blog later i guess.

lol. ok today was a great day. went to wen zhao's house in the morning and it was just a great time of catching up with each other. it's been a long time since we've seen each other too so it was just nice to see him again. well he has shifted house and now stays on the 37th floor so it's super windy up there. and his house looks very nice now. even the stove does not require fire. lol. cool ei! watched bleach 164 there too. played dota on zion with other ppl and we totally owned the other ppl. haha. then went home and just slacked before meeting jerome to watch spiderwick chronicles at tiong baruh. not a bad show. it's very nice but it's quite predictable but still a nice show. i give it 4/5! lol. what a day today.

today was a slacky day. slacky but fun. lol.ok still sick with throat infection and not knowing that doughnuts are fried and thinking they are baked, i ate 3 of them. now my throat is gonna get worse and it's already pain enough. praying that God heals me. drank super lot of water to try to negate the effect of it and hope it works. well, played pool with jerome in the evening and yes, don't need to guess. i got thrashed. but what i'm pissed off at is that i aim properly everything is set but the ball still does not go in. gotta find the cause of it and fix it.

ON TO THE BEST PART OF THE DAY. THE MAN U & PORTSMOUTH. man u lost 1-0. funny part was that kuszczak their only keeper for that match got sent off. and ferdinand replaced him. how lame could that get. anyway i'm not a supporter of any of the big 4 and here are the reasons why.

Liverpool- too many supporters especially after 2005! i dare say some of them are fake. (don't be offended if u are a liverpool fan, i'm sure u are a true fan) ESPECIALLY ALL THOSE WHO DON'T KNOW TORRES BEFORE HE JOINED LIVERPOOL. i didnt watch soccer then,so i didn't know alot of players. lol. but he is a good player.

Chealsea- THEY SUCK! buy all the good players but still so sucky!and cause matthew supports them makes it easier to hate them.

ManU- i like their players & manager but i just don't know why i got this thing against them. i like watching them lose to the underdogs. lol.

Arsenal- i don't mind them. actually i feel neutral towards them. just don't feel like supporting them.

ok... basically i just enjoy watching the big 4 lose to the underdogs. fun to watch. anyway time to watch newcastle be owned by liverpool.. lol!

ok, today's going to be another ranting session. if you don't wanna see then don't.

i seriously hate him man. he's supposed to be a father but he's screwed up. all he does is break the family up even if he does it unintentionally. seriously, ok first let me describe his character. he is lazy, hypocritical, irritating, arrogant, chauvanistic, egoistic, self absorbed, big talker and the thing which pisses me off the most is he can't practice what he preaches.

let me start with lazy. now that he's without a job he wastes away at home almost everyday. he often talks about 'opportunities' through friends. but i really have no idea if he really does have any true friends at all. he also sees gambling as an income. he buys 4d, toto and bets on soccer on a almost weekly basis spending at least on an average, $200+ a week. he is incomeless FYI and this really pisses me off especially after seeing how hard my mum works. GET A LIFE! LITERALLY!

hypocritical- PLEASE GO STRAIGHT TO THE DAMN POINT! especially if u want something. He says "Lincoln, what is your notebook for? can i borrow it because my OWN (which my mum paid for) notebook got very little battery life and i want to type in my room" when this is his actual intention "Lincoln, land me your notebook because i am too lazy to unplug my notebook from outside and put it back after using it." I can see ur motives and thoughts too well especially after living with you for 16+ years. well anyway my reply to him was "my laptop also no battery life. only last 1 hour"

now on to irritating. sometimes he really talks alot of crap. he talks about saving money all day! DON'T GET ME WRONG! SAVING MONEY IS A GOOD HABIT AND ONE THAT WE SHOULD ALL PRACTICE! in the afternoon, he will be like off the light electricity is more expensive now. i really think it's alright if any other human says it. I hate him for saying this when i look at how much he spends on gambling and all his other shit. if u save on ur gambling and other shit, you'll definitely save much more than turning off the damn light. "the wind is windy, you might want to turn off the fan" is another one of his favourites nowadays and it is really pissing me off.

arrogant, chauvanistic, egoistic, self absorbed, big talker are all linked into one. to have either one of those flaws, you are bound to have the other. his arrogance really pisses me off. he honestly talks very proudly. he will often try to make himself seem powerful and high up in front of others. like during chinese new year, he will tell ppl i'm working in mediacorp working on some project. A DAMN NICE WAY OF PUTTING IT HUH! when ppl hear this they must think WAH EARN SO MUCH AH! but they don't know the truth la of course. this links to big talker as well. lol. ok let me start on his self absorbification and how it leads to even more big talking. he thinks he is damn handsome and young which i find utterly disgusting for a person who is supposed to be mature. he will often ask my brother who is the most handsome of us all (refering to my brother, him and i) bo liao right? and when people call him uncle, he will say just call me brother will do. ppl usually think he is joking but he actually means it (some part of him does) dumb right? and whenever he gets a freaking pimple, he will purposely emphasise on it to prove the point that he is young.. seriously nothing better to do. his egoism and chauvanisticness can be seen when he treats my mum like dirt. i can tell that there is no love between them anymore and that my mum is only keeping this marriage for the sake of my brother and i and he is only keeping it because my mum is the only person who can & will support him. thats why he always expects my mum to give him money, pay for bill, debts, ect. it really disgusts me for a husband to treat his wife this way. i mean it may not seem as bad as physical abuse but to me it's around the same level.

well you might think, lincoln, what's the point of typing this? well it definitely helps me to feel better. i don't feel comfortable telling my friends about this so i won't relate to them about this directly. and only 2 of my closests friends know my blog so i feel comfortable typing such things. well, yet another ranting session.

on to today. today was a really mixed day. i guess the sickness is still there so it affected the mood. was supposed to go for some it fair but in the end, went to tiong with alden and shengwei. got my laptop bag and a mouse for my father............................ ate burger king which i definitely regret. bad for my throat. went to safra to play pool. well i really suck at it now. all of my losses except one of them was caused by me hitting the white ball in after the black. well, my skill really sucks now. well.. pretty tired now. see ya!

well.. hopefully my laptop isn't screwed up but i get the feeling that there is something wrong with it. well. today's been a really tiring day. i guess the fever has taken it's toll on me. still feeling pretty sick right now. alex & alden were supposed to stay over today.. but i was sick. sorry guys. hmm went to orchard to see dr. cheong and got that medicine that makes my lips dry again. but i only have to go with that for 6 more weeks so i guess i gotta peservere. hmm.. hopefully i would feel better by tomorrow so i will be able to go for the it fair thing.

well, don't really understand what to do about the poly forms but at least i've filled up the form E which deadline is on the 10th of march. well.. hmm.. you know just 2 years ago, i would have never expected my spiritual walk to be in this state. lol. well, guess life is really unpredictable so you gotta live each day as ur last? well, easier said than done but that's one thing i'm gonna try doing. well, glad to see my father is still putting in abit of effort into seeking for an income. i just pray that he will accept christ as his Lord and Saviour. but it's hard to reach out to him.

i've been trying to imagine what life in scotland would be like, and to be honest, it's hard to imagine. lol. i gotta do everything on my own. stuff like ironing ect. well, i've been pretty worried about my mum too. she seriously has been overworking herself and i seriously think she should not as it's very health harming. and she has started driving to work and she is a new driver so i'm quite worried about that too but i'm gonna commit that to God as well.

well, i seroiusly have to start giving thanks to God too. ok today i wanna thank God for showing me what great friends i have. i realised that i've not too many true friends. my only true friends i have right now are jerome, alex, alden. i mean i know we will be there for each other no matter what. whereas for my other friends, my relationship with them is based on meeting up. like if we don't meet/talk we won't be as close. well.. lol. pray for me whoever reads this yea? that i will be healed of my illness.

ok.. today was not that bad a day. went to queensway at noon to get alden's soccer shoe and jerome's tennis racket. then went to NP to play soccer. NP is not say far from my house, just that it's not near either and i'll be going there for at least 4 months so.. hmm..

soccer was ok. i seriously need to improve but i'm not that hungry for improvment as in i don't feel that it is a neccesity. well, i guess i spent more time sitting than playing, but played quite alot. there were really alot of people there at the later part of the day so went home first.

hmm... life's been pretty slack for the past few months! past 5 months actually! never really had that long a holiday in my life. nowadays i find it hard to get up early. that also means, for the past 5 months, i went to chuch less than 4 times which is bad when i think about it now. not to say that i'm not interested in going back it's just that when you don't see eye to eye with your leader, it makes it harder to go back. and no, this is definitely not about pride. well.. maybe i should just switch church.

well come to think of it, it has been a long time since i used my hands to do some writing. NP life will definitely be different from fairfield life though.

didn't go to church again yesterday. i keep giving myself excuses not to go. i know it's wrong but i've been doing this since sec3 so it feels normal now. it always happens like this. the day before i feel like going then on the day itself i'll be like sian.. then i end up not going. anyway i'm gonna try to go next week or i'll break the twice a month deal with uncle shijiang.. weird right.. i gotta call my cell leader uncle.. i have no idea why too. they just make us do that.

anyway yesterday was just a great day of catching up with kenneth, tai li and timothy. it's hard to imagine how close i was with them just a few years ago and how much i've drifted apart from them over this few years. i guess this is the result of not going to church for a long long time. well, ended up playing pool and lan with them. it was a crazy night though. we finished playing lan at like 9.30 so we couldn't find a place to eat at paradiz. so we ended up going back to plaza sing to grab a bite at burger king which was still open. really had a great time with them today and i'm looking forward to my next outing with them.

feelings towards my dad are still the same. he never fails to piss me off once a day. i mean if you got hands then use it. i'm not petty about helping him. it's just that he is really very lazy and inconsiderate. will illustrate on it soon hopefully with some pictures too.

hmm... today has not really been a fruitful day at all. whoever sees this better not tell anyone about this la.. so today.. my dad talked to my mum about selling the flat and shifting. like since they only paid very cheap for this house at the point in time where they bought it they will profit alot and my mum says she will have no problem funding my education in scotland? lol. but i'm gonna bet she's not gonna get a cent of it due to some idiot i'd hate to but have no choice but to call my father. the moment my mum told me of this i knew it's gonna be one of her biggest mistakes in her life. i really don't care whether or not who gets the money. it's just that the process and the hypocrisy behind it. i am more or less sure what is going through my father's mind.. i mean he's like gonna quit his job again with no spare job.. what the heck right. and he's gonna freeload on my mum again. i mean families go through bad and good times together but during his good times he's never here with us and only during the bad times he comes back for help.. i mean u may think i'm just a 16+ year old coming 17 this year teenager what do i know and who am i to talk about him like this.. but i've been seeing this crap for the past few years of my life and it's not really a pleasant sight and i don't intend to see it again. well.. i guess he is like this cause of his relationship with God? (actually there's no relationship with God at all, from my perspective) He is seriously too arrogant to humble himself down before God (again, who am i to say this.. just ranting) He thinks he's the best he refuses to be realistic and be down to earth and he's seriously starting to piss me off big time. i really pity my mum who works so hard (leaves home at 6.30 and reaches home at 11 on an average basis) and yet has to go through what she's going through. i mean now since he's got no income who's gonna pay the bills? who pays for my brother's tuition fees. even in his good times when he was doing well, it was my mum paying for my brother's and my education. i dare say that my mum contributed 100% to my education in terms of finance and time. all he ever did was give some pet talks which never seem to work and all he does is claim the credit. HERE's an example! when i got my o level results, which was not bad at all l1r5, 11, he was so proud about it and he attributed my success to his talks about getting my basics right? thats utter bullshit. it's through God and hard work. especially during chinese new year he would show off and show off to my other aunties and uncles about my grades and there's nothing i can do about it? worse thing is he seriously has this I-AM-BETTER-THAN-EVERYONE complex. i can seriously see it from the way he talks. he's really really getting on my nerves especially since the start of this year. i pray every night that he changes to be a better person and he treats my mom better. WELL, HE DID & GUESS WHY. CAUSE HE NEEDED CASH. i feel like giving up on praying for him cause it never seems to work. i feel that praying for him is a lost cause already.

ok.. that was long.. lol.. ranted enough. well today i finally learnt how to make lime juice? as in the really nice one. hahaha. can't go to gameslab tomorrow cause of some appointment. well.. i really don't feel synchronised with God at all. i'm like super distant. i have no idea how i have drifted this far from God. i remember being very close to Him in the past but now.. it's like a whole new story. whenever i go back to church and all, my relationship with my family goes bad. i mean it's like whenever i try to go back to God the devil tries very hard to take me down. and this has happened many many times already. but i don't think thats the thing keeping me away from God.

anyway.. schools gonna start soon. business studies @np.. don't really know how i'm feeling about it. neutral i guess. but i really wanna go to scotland to study cause i really wanna get away from Singapore for awhile. i mean i've got some really great friends here but there's so little worth staying here for. and it's really a great experience and opportunity to be able to go there. haha.. well what a long post today.. longest i've ever typed i think.

cruisers are nicer than breezers!! anw.. long day today ok not that long.. completed devil may cry 4 today.. yea its quite easy, fun too. anw went to eat botak jones then played pool at depot road. the botak burger is really nice and the serving is quite big. lol. went to play soccer at dover after that. well... alex and alden shouted outside my house damn loudly. quarreling. never seend alden like that before.. lol. bused back home. well my walk with God for the past year has be damn weak. hardly go to church. well.. its hard to get it back on track. seriously hate my father. as in not hate. i love him just that i really don't like his character.. but well, who am i to judge. lol.

is it that hard to let me say sorry? what the hell man.. anw got devil may cry 4 today compliments of my mum. went to clementi yamaha to look at some music stuff. got some sale there. today sucked. didnt go church. supposed to meet kenneth they all but ended up not going.. sian..

well day started out ok today. went with alex to collect his handphone to wheelock place. it was not even ready man.. lol. plz check before collecting next time la! then went to a clinic at shaw centre to collect medication for my mum. yeap. had lunch at nydc. then we met my mum at plaza sing then walked over to some other place for some meeting with some agent for my overseas studies. lol. now australia is out of the picture. seriously considering going to the uk to study. but its quite expensive.. 230k?? lol man.. really dun wanna end up screwing up and wasting my mums money. well really quite keen on going, just that.. umm yea dun really feel like staying in singapore. after that played soccer at dover there? yea. lol. came home & ordered macs........... feeling so screwed up now man... my walk with God is so screwed up.. everythings screwed up man... somemore like.. argh sian la..

lol.. i honestly honestly feel like going to australia already. lol. sucks lah... God bless. lol

well, really feel like leaving singapore and going to australia to study. i mean.. yea for a change & all. but i'm gotta leave so many things behind ok well not many mainly my family and 2 other close friends thats all. if i leave, i leave in april. lol

err well.. today was a long day. watched jumper in the morning. not that bad a show. i don't know why so many people rate it quite low. well, played pool as well. i think i've improved a fair bit. bought one republic and simple plan cds. well, i got accepted into np business studies but now i'm like given the choice to go australia to study? not really prepared to go there but i might go cause of all the time it will save. yesterday was great yea, ps i love you was not too bad. :) walk with God hasn't been going too well.. i should try my best to go church this sunday. anw games lab on saturday too. nowadays i don't really feel as excited about church activities as before. well.... life definitely feels different from 2 years back. lol.

maybe im not really as close to them as i thought. maybe..

OK! DECIDED TO START BLOGGING AGAIN! HAHA. haha buddy!! why are you doing this!! oh record time!! I STUDIED 5 HOURS! but not enough. o levels are super soon.. arghhh. must start doing qt already. severely spiritually unstable!! supposed to watch the rataouiee with alex and jerome BUT...... oh and i got new amps yesterday!! 30 watts HAHA! the effects are awesome especially the reverb. since my room is SO SMALL! the reverb helps alot. haha see ya!

feeling damnnnn lost now laa.

i hate myself i suck at everything!

went to watch harry potter today! late show!

i feel so colddd every night.

just for one day i wish i could disappear.. just one day.

...... today went to school.. lots of dumb things happened. during d&t after school matthews hand got splintered! and he was such a dumbooo haha! went to subway with alden and joel for dinner. hahahahaha.. do you laugh when you cry?

f.life

limiting my use of compputer so i can't blog everyday anymore. hhaha! feel like i am becoming more and more emo. i feel sad so easily nowadays. i wish i have no friends at all! the constant pressure that keeps hanging over me, that makes me feel so empty. f life.

woah! today was full of stuff. a mix of many many emotions! let's see, i was HAPPY:) SAD:( ANGRY!! REMORSEFULLLL REGRETFULL CONTENTEDD APPRECIATIVEE. i really really like christabel as A FRIEND, A GOOD ONE! and i thank God for her! :D ahh, quarrelled badly with my mom.. and though i aploagised i know the hurt i caused can't be gone just like that. i gotta redeem myself through my actions. so, i got 2 tickets for ndp preview... what shall i do with them! haah.. i don't know myself! my throat still hurts a little.. oral on monday!

ok.. so basically the last few days i was real sick. even gave chinese o level oral a miss. but thankfully i get to retake it on next monday! more time to prepare! :D ahh my throat hurts and i can't eat much!! went back to school today DESPITE MY SICKNESS TO DO D&T! AHAHHAHAHAHA

hhaha didn't blog yesterday as i was sick la.. super high fever!! so i shall blog about yesterday today. yesterday actually nothing much happened. didn't manage to go for amath tuition cause of fever. i really felt that i was going to die la! very scary.

lettt goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

some youth day this is.

ahh, i dislike this. i gotta do my amath work and all my answers are wrong. crap man.. i gotta finish it by tomorrow and this sucks so much more!! today studied quite alot. gonna do work again..

haha, woke up pretty early today despite yesterday's late night. supposed to have tuition in the morning but didn't go as i did not complete the homework. haha, no more slacking! ! did abit of d&t folio today and a math. at night went for dinner with my uncle and aunt to celebrate my mum's birthday! ate super alot. ahh my cousin's back from australia for a while. he's been studying there for quite a while already laa. gonna meet him soon. christabel's such a good friend!

hehh the day started out with DENTAL at 9am. i dislike visiting dentists!! but at least i didn't have to do much as my teeth were fine! :D then went home and alex came over to meet before we headed for cine to meet up with alden, joel, shengwei, daryl, grayson and heng guang. went to catch Goal 2! it was a nice show but the ending was pretty dumb! haha. then went to play lan. we played cs!! had a great time. then we went to fish & co for dinner but daryl had to leave. celebrated joel's birthday also. we got him a cake from NYDC. been slacking ever since. haven't done a math work laaa crap! talking to christabel now!!

today is friday, the LAST school day of the week! well, learnt quite alot today. had physics practical, e math, history, chinese & lastly d&t. stayed in school till about 5+ to work on my workpiece. progressing quite ok, abit better than i expected. ordered macdonalds for dinner today and i ate super alot, 1 double cheese burger meal with extra fries and drinks! everything was large size.. ahhh i'm gonna get some sickness soon, so NO MORE FAST FOOD FOR A MONTH! ahhh!

anyway, today was quite a productive day especially during D&T, Started on my project at LONG last! haha, i feel motivated for D&T at last and that's a good sign and at least i didn't wake up too late so at least I still have roughly about 1 month to catch up with the rest.

i can really feel alot of evil building up in my heart and it feels very sucky. as each day passes by, i see my heart feeling more and more bitter towards everything around me. i really don't know what's going on with me at all.

well today, was a WASTE OF TIME. ended up slacking ALOT! and since i just got my com back today, i've been hooked on it! went to school, and had classes as usual! but today there was a total of 4 periods of english!! after school i went home la.. haiz.. d&t tomorrow. i'm the slowest already..

it was a special day though, in a special way!

haha, didn't post yesterday, my com was spoilt! it just came back today. well, yesterday went to school and stayed back for d&t.. it's crapp laa. my project is pretty messed up. better buck up and pull up my socks.

today was the first day of school! didn't went that well but didn't go that bad either. well started the term with a booking for not bringing my report book. (GREAT WAY TO START A TERM) anyway, lesson learnt! always bring your report book on the first day. it slipped my mind, i was too focused on all the other undone homework. had an afternoon nap because for some weird reason, i was feeling very very tired. looks like i gotta change my sleeping pattern AGAIN! no more late nights. well, gotta do 2 book reviews and 1 compo now by 10pm!! SHUCKS!

GOD BLESS YOU!

today's the last day of holidays. couldn't go church or my cousin's 1 month party today. had a maths tuition instead. today learnt about applications of integration and vectors. vectors is just like the vectors in e math. it's quite easy, for now. had macdonalds for dinner. my com has a big problem la! it keeps hanging!!! ahh! I pray to God that it won't hang anymore so I can finish my homework! Gotta burn midnight oil and suffering from the usual last day of holiday blue. EVEN WORSE THAN SUNDAY EVENING BLUES!! I thank God for the many unseen surprises of TOMORROW!

ok anyway today did nothing much. had chinese tuition for oral exam in the morning together with Jerome. after that i had e maths tuition. gave lunch a miss as there was just not enough time. argh.. School's starting in like a few days time and my homework is not complete!! went to jerome's house after my tuition to study a maths and to talk as well. went for dinner with my family at some eatery. quite reluctant to go there at first but it turned out well!

Continuing from my previous post, I can't really blame my tutor about my spiritual problem as my quiet time is not consistent at all. Ya, anyway after O Levels (still hating the O word!), everything's gonna be great! :D

didn't post yesterday, was too tired.

anyway today sucks la. why do i always have to give up my spiritual/social life for the sake of a maths tuition. i mean it's not that i don't want to have the tuition it's just that the tuition used to be on Sunday morning but now the tutor can't make it, SO I CONSTANTLY HAVE TO GIVE UP GOING TO CHURCH SO I CAN GO FOR TUITION cause if i don't go my mum will scold and make a big fuss about it. and the worst part is the tutor knows that i go to church at that time and told me to put tuition as a priority. another example is tomorrow, my cousin has a one month old party but i can't go BECAUSE OF TUITION. NEITHER CAN I GO TO CHURCH.. and my mum supports it. i told him to put tomorrow's tuition in the morning but he keep saying cannot and he always expects me to GIVE UP my rights to church, etc. just for tuition. i don't think it's fair at all!

God show me a way.

anyway on the 22nd June which was yesterday, I did nothing much. Practically slacked the whole day away again..

today was super tiring.. did nothing much in the morning then went to play soccer in the afternoon with alex, alden, bryan, jerome, wesely, mok, mok's cousin, mutt, kiefer(how to spell, sorry!), sheng wei, caleb. it was super fun, anyway i think it would be our last game till after o levels. i just hate the O word.. haven't been studying much the past 2 weeks and when i see everyone else studying so hard, i feel super stressed. especially for d&t.. it sucks man d&t.. haven't even started yet.. only person who can help me now is God!!

today went to school for chem remedial in the morning. many people did not go! learnt alot about the aqeous cation all this. haha! it was great. then went home after that. at around 2, went for a hair cut at great world city!! then after that went out with jerome, first to bugis then to tiong baruh plaza. went bugis to get his dvd but it wasn't there so we went back to tiong to catch nancy drew. not that bad a show, i used to like the books! ahhh!!!

hmm.. today didn't do anything much except went to jerome's house for awhile to talk. oh and i re-watched dejavu with my brother. haha. mum got some doughnuts for tomorrow's breakfast!

































at that point, i was very sure.

i'm gonna be so good just to kick you!

ok today, went school early for remedial in fact one hour earlier as i thought it would start at 8 but it started at 9 instead. in the end met wen hui and khai dan and we went for breakfast at dover. had maths remedial after that. woah, i realised that i forgot alot about the basics already and that isn't too good!! went home after that and played GUNBOUND! i restarted playing again to DE-STRESS. then went to telok blangah with my family to have lunch and after that went to singapore national eye centre (SNEC) for my eye check up! crap la, they dillated my eye and it was very stinggy and i had blur vision because of it. as in all the stuff that is near me i can't see when i wear my specs but without my specs i can see! it's crazy and PAINFUL la.. seeya!

hah! didn't blog yesterday so i'll do it today.

gave church a miss yesterday sadly.. went for a math tuition in the evening and learnt more about integration then my family and i went to swensens at holland v to celebrate father's day! hah, good food! watched de javu later.. super cool show but it's a bit freaky!

went out with jerome in the evening. met leroy and all of them in the bus on the way to orchard. then at orchard, john little we went to grab a few christian cds. after that walked to plaza sing to get guitar strings and i got a DVD, de javu. it is a cool show, so i heard. then went to yoshinoya to eat and went to carls jr. to get milkshake. it was very nice!! after that walked around awhile more and we bought sushi to bring back home.. then took a bus to queensway to look for ps2 games! but don't have any. so we went back home. after that went to his house to play winning eleven. as usual i got thrashed! but it was fun. argh.. haven't started on my a math tuition work and it is due tomorrow all 40 questions!!

went to catch fantastic 4 today with alden and joel. it was some TM Asia insurance screening thing. it was a very nice show and silver surfer is super cool. after that went to NYDC for dinner. three of us shared 2 mud pies la. it was very nice. alex was supposed to come but he didn't.. fun day.

another slacky day. i'm practically wasting away my holidays la... can't stand it.. and i'm not even doing anything about it.

today has been quite depressing . i didn't do much work . . in fact , i OVERPLAYED!! went to jerome's house at night and played winning eleven with eugene and him . lost to both of them!! i suck man! ahahaha. then played xmen legends too . . now nothing to do gonna sleep haha. too tired to blog.

today , went quite okay. studied in the morning , as usual then played ps2 . . had chemistry tuition to pull my chemistry up as it is super lousy now . . ahh i'm gonna have muffins for breakfast tomorrow ! !











my life and your life is just like a see-saw , can't we ever stay in equilibrium ?

i will be still, know you are God .

woah today was quite crazy. first off, went to D&T workshop and got alot of crap from MR (YOU KNOW WHO). then, went to study with alex and alden. finished 3 of the physics worksheets at last! still got so much more though. . then after studying we went to daily scoops to eat ice cream. haha it was nice . then we went to clementi to eat KFC! ! went to big book shop to get some stuff also . after that went to alden's house. we played winning eleven and i won alex but alden won me . he's the best la ! after that we went onto the road to play soccer . it was quite empty except for a few cars and such that passed by . literally STREET SOCCER ! haha! went home after that . was supposed to visit my granny who just undergone an operation but crap happened . then saw alot of crap also . aiya in fact, all that happened at night was crap (most of it!) i hope that God will help me through all this crap ! :D

woah! today was a really really long day . . the day started with my mom waking me up saying that my grand ma is in hospital going for operation . . she asked me if i wanted to go. but i was like half asleep and i didn't really know what she was talking about untill i called her when i woke up. after that headed to church . the message was quite helpful , and it gave me much insight about life ! thank GOD! :) after that went for a math tuition. learnt about integration and it is quite boring . . now i have super lot of work to do! ! after that at like 6.30, met jerome at tiong baruh to catch shrek 3! nice and stupidly lame show ! someone was "SUPPOSED" to show but . . . . haha ! so that was it for today, a nice and long sunday ! :)

today.. was a super super waste of time. ended up only doing a few questions of maths for the WHOLE DAY. went out for dinner with my family to ikea. ate super alot! the meatballs are still the best. hmm.. gonna slack now..

saturday's tend to get hot and boring..

Service Learning Cambodia 2007! (:

Day 1

Left for the airport and Jerome’s uncle fetched us there at like 3.30am. We reached the airport at around 4am. Met alden, sheng wei, leroy, alex at burger king and we ate there. after that checked in with the group of 40+. went to the departure hall after that and walked around abit before boarding the plane. Plane ride was pretty funny. Sat next to qiao sen and Leroy. Crapped a whole lot about final destination & we were pretty scared the plane would crashhh. Touched down and boarded the bus which brought us to the hotel named princess hotel. Couldn’t check in as it was still too early for that so we left our baggages in the teacher’s room. Ms toh fell sick with fever so she rested there. Went to the hotel restaurant to catch breakfast. Did’nt eat much as I ate earlier already. After that went for a city tour to like some flea market like that. Sold many many stuff there. I bought 2 shirts as it was quite cheap and nice. After that continued the city tour to a lot of different places. Took some group photos. Then we went to some high class buffet lunch. After that it was a drive to see the school we were gonna help in the village. The place looked quite run down and had many flies there but the sight of the children took all that away. They were so cute la!! We were told of what we had to do for the next few days. After checking the school out, checked in to the hotel. We were given some time to wash up before going for dinner. Watched the hotel tv. To my surprise there were so many channels!!! :D my room mate was alex. Yea so we went for dinner at some place which I can’t remember. Went back to hotel after that and had devotions with the group. Then after that it was our own free time.

Day 2

Today we had to wake up pretty early. Morning call was at 5.30 . woke up & showered then jerome, alex, alden, Leroy, sheng wei and I went down for breakfast. Haha it was the same place as the day before. After that, went to the school. We were divided into groups of 3. the diggers, the painters and the teachers. I was in the diggers. So we went to collect our tools and started digging the area to lay the pipes down. It was real tough work especially under the very very very hot sun!! however, it was the first time I did such a thing and it really left me with quite an experience. We had many many water breaks and never did water taste so sweet! Went for lunch at some village place. I guess it was the food there that caused the food poisoning later on. After lunch, went back to the school to work. Many people started to fall sick, some vomited, others had real bad headaches. but, we just continued working. At 4+, we had Cambodian language class. The teacher was great and interesting but I just couldn’t grasp the concept of khmer. Haha, the children there were really very poor but contented. It really tells me how much I should appreciate what I have and not keep asking for more. After the class we went off back to the hotel to shower and then go for dinner. By dinner, I started to have fever. It really sucked though. I thought that it was just a normal fever. After dinner, went back to the hotel and showered. Caught abit of tv and then went to sleep. Alex was not feeling well already. He felt like vomiting la. Suddenly in the middle of the night, I woke up to vomit. I thought I would feel better already la but in the end that was just the start of a long long nightmare.We had devotions that night as well and that really lightened up my day.

Day 3

Woke up at 5 to bathe. Was feeling super sick. Alex was already very sick so I brought him to go look for ms toh. We were given some medicine which tasted pretty crappy. By then I realized my fever reached 39.7 la. I was experiencing serious vertigo. Never felt anything like it before. So basically, I slept on the bed for almost the whole morning. When ms toh woke me up to go to the hospital, I was feeling even sicker!! I could not even stand properly la. So we went to the hospital by a van along with mark ho, joseph, Joanna. Amy & alden accompanied their various friends there. I was first to see the doctor. The doctor said I had to be hospitalized la!!!! I was thinking wa crap!! And I had to be put on drip to replace the salt level in my body.. the needle was very big, bigger than the usual vaccination needles. Felt very very uncomfortable. Rested on the hospital bed. My bunkmate was joseph, my p4 friend. So we had a lot of chances to catch up on life. It was great talking to him again. But it was a great pity that we were unable to help in the school. The children really needed our help la. But I couldn’t give it to them. Then it struck me, why am I always worrying about my problems and all. My problems are so small compared to what so many other people are going through. I was saddened by that fact as it only goes to show that I may be a Christian but some where in my heart, there still is selfishness. But that’s all gonna change soon. Skipped the hospital dinner and basically just slept there and talked the whole day. Time seemed to pass so slowly. We were practically counting down the hours till day break. Everything throughout that day felt so dreamy. I even lost my sense of humor!! I knocked out at 7pm.

Day 4

Woke up asking joseph: is it 8pm?? It felt like only 1 hour had passed since I fell asleep but actually, it was already 4.30am in the morning. Boy was I relieved. Almost 10 hours had passed in the blink of an eye. Immediately, I went to mr wong’s room and asked me what time can we go back? Had a breakfast of porridge. It was quite tasty excluding the liver part. Really really really really wanted to go to the school in the later part of the day to help but I guess we couldn’t. so we were discharged eventually and I went back to the hotel feeling much better. Ever since then, I had a phobia whenever I put something in my mouth. I was scared of getting food poisoning again. Went back to the hotel room to catch more sleep as we only had to meet for dinner at 6.30 and it was only lunch time. It was a good time of reflection for me as I was able to see through my past actions through a different set of eyes. I guess after exposure to the people of Cambodia, the eyes of my heart gradually opened and I really wanna thank God for that. Slept and woke up for dinner. We went to some restaurant but my appetite had not come back yet so didn’t eat much. By the end of the day, I was pretty much feeling okay already. I got my sense of humor back. By today we were supposed to have finished all work at the school but I highly doubt that it was achieved and I am feeling really bad for that. I mean we could have done so much more. But most of us fell sick especially me, I even had to be in the hospital. So went back to the hotel and messed about, watching tv and playing guitar. Ms toh’s guitar is really nice to play. After that slept.

Day 5

Today would be the second best day of the trip. the long bus ride to siem reap was quite fun la except for the boring sleeping parts. It was a 4 hour + bus ride la! Had a few stops in between the journey to catch a breather etc. so once we reached the place, we went for lunch at some place. It was buffet style AGAIN! But this time round the food wasn’t that bad. In fact after so many days, I have just started to get used to the food there. After that, we checked in the hotel. OH MAN! THE HOTEL WAS BIG BIG BIG. We could climb and we did clim over the balcony to get to the next room la. There was a single bed and a queen size bed! Oh ya, and that day was the star wars marathon crap so there wasn’t any other movie on star movies except for STAR WARS.. it’s a nice show but it gets real boring after watching it a few times. After that, we went to Angkor watt. It was fun down there. We took many stupid photos and alden got super trigger happy. Angkor watt really lives up to its reputation. It is HUMONGOUS! There are also many cool chambers inside. We also climbed this super steep super tall thing. It was not scary to climb up as long as you don’t look down but the going down part was scary. Haha, after that we went back to the hotel and showered to go for dinner. To cut the long story short, after dinner we went back to the hotel. Alex and I shifted in with alden, Jerome, Leroy and sheng wei so we sort of like 3 people in a room. They played cards and some other stuff while I fell asleep first. Haha!

Day 6

Today’s gonna be the last day in Cambodia.. :( didn’t do much today except wake up super early to go to the airport. Had breakfast during the bus ride there la. Well, at that point, everything felt different. It’s like going back to a reality which I don’t wanna go. Being in Cambodia felt so carefree, no stress unlike the life in Singapore. So after reaching the airport we checked in and boarded the plane. GOOD BYE CAMBODIA :( I’ll miss Cambodia a lot a lot a lot. Touched down at Singapore changi airport. Ms toh told us some saddening news.. ya guess the only good thing that happened on that day was nothing. THIS IS THE END!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

so basically that's a brief break down of what happened in cambodia. it was really an eye-opener for me. it has changed my view on life alot. i miss cambodia STILL! i guess God has many ways of showing us new stuff!

ok so today's been pretty slacky. did work in the morning. slacked after that. continued doing work in the afternoon then went to play soccer. it feels so different from the past already. i guess nothing really stays the same. after that went to church for some ministry session. it was touching. went home and here i am blogging. nothing much happened today i suppose. i finished writing about cambodia! :D

didn't manage to blog yesterday. haha. yesterday was a fun day. went to school for geog remedial from 8 to 10. learnt about tourism and industries. after the remedial, met alden and i met alex at dover for breakfast. after that went to learn@fairfield to study. it was quite productive except for the parts where we slacked alot. after that at about 1.45, left for queensway with them to meet sheng wei there. alden got his new shoe. then we went for lunch at ikea. it was nice time for us to catch up. met sheng wei's friends there as well. fun bunch...... haha. so i guess that's it gonna go church later for some minsitry :D

haha today's been pretty productive and i wanna thank God for it. studied quite abit today. went to school at about noon to catch up with my d&t stuff. did much stuff for my folio but i have ALOT to catch up. met jerome after that and we went to macdonalds for lunch. after that, went home studied and had e maths tuition. was pretty meaningful, todays tuition. learnt alot in such a short period of time! after that, ate dinner and watched TV!!!!!! haven't been reading the bible much lately. i pray that i'll have the discipline to. SEE YAAAAA

the Cambodia diary should be out tomorrow!! :D

tooday went to school to study with alex and alden. as usual alex came late so alden and i started first. studied till like 10+ then went to dover for brunch and met alex there as well. i drank my first can of anything and it tasted real awful!! went back to continue studying.. nothing much happened after that. then at about 1 o clock, we went dover for lunch. after that met jerome and went home together. after going home i started to get too restless to study so i packed up my room. now it's really really neat and i feel great. jerome came up for awhile as well. talked and joked abit. so i guess thats all for today! oh and i got the cambodia photos from alden and it really brings back super lot of memories!

today was the first day of intensive mugging. did quite well, studied a grand total of 5hours+. but most importantly, i finished a quater of maths homework!! now i gotta do geog for tomorrow's remedial. today was a pretty boring day actually. it was basically just studying, watch tv, study, watch tv. except for the part where jerome came up for a while. changed the guitar strings and had a short conversation. still suffering from post cambodia blues though and it feels kind of dumb. still in the process of writing the cambodia diary. it's quite difficult to recall all the incidents vividly. i pray for _____ that you'll be blessed with peace, comfort and love.

back from cambodia! it was a great learning experience excluding the mass case of food poisoning. i managed to learn ALOT and see life from a whole new angle. i met many other people too! i'm gonna do a detailed cambodia diary and post it once it's ready. it's gonna be good i suppose. everything feels different now. i feel so lonely now, like WHERE HAVE ALL MY FRIENDS GONE TO?? gonna take some getting used to before things settle down. but one things for sure, LIFE IS NEVER GONNA BE THE SAME AGAIN! my heart is all mixed up now and it feels stupid!

argh.. gonna sleep for 4 hours now. gotta wake up at like 2.55am to get to the airport by 4.00am! i hope i respond to the sound of the alarm clock! gonna cab to the airport tomorrow morning.. feeling quite mixed about the trip like half excited, half bored.

somehow, i just feel like backing out of the trip.

woah it's like only a few hours time before my flight to cambodia. just finished packing my bag. wa! i'm very afraid that it'll exceed the weight limit la! it's like super heavy like that. anyway it was o level chinese today.. don't exactly know how well i will do. i did the informal letter writing and the compo on cultivating interests of reading. hope i didn't misread the question this time round. last time during mid year exam, i misread the question and ended up getting 20/50 despite my compo being 4 & 1/2 pages long! paper 2 was quite tough though especially the last comprehension passage. didn't really understand much of the passage. but still it's by God's grace that i managed to understand almost everything else. :) God has been faithful, now it's my turn.

in about 10 hours time, it's mother tongue o levels. for me, it will be chinese! :( i'm really gonna commit all to God! :D

Dear daddy,
it's been a long road since sec 1 in chinese. my grades have been constantly dipping. i know i may not even deserve to pass this paper, but whatever the results, what ever you bless me with, i'm content. i may feel unsastisfied about a C or a B grade or maybe even a fail. but i'll be content with the results because i know my preperation for the paper does not deserve high grades. i commit it all to you daddy. i'm sorry for drifiting away from you so much for the past 1 & 1/2 years.. sorry for forsaking my relationship with you. i've been broken many times but yet almost everytime i fail to see your broken heart at my wrong doings. i yearn to change my heart o daddy, may it be a heart of humbleness and be full of the joy of the lord! once again i commit everything to you. i pray that you'll bless all the participants in the exams & bless them too with good grades. in daddy's most precious name, AMEN! :D:D:D

i feel much better now! :)

went to shaslik for dinner! it was super nice. had shaslik beef steakk. some beef soup. bread (super soft and nice). escargot. had baked alaska for desert! yum!

amazing how you can hear God speaking to you during a game of icy tower! :)

AHH!! CHINESE O LEVELS IN 2 DAYS!!!! :(

this morning had chinese tuition. went pretty well. we talked about some 'hot' topics that might come out. went through letter writing. after tuition pranked called alex with jerome! it was super super lame la. then slacked abit & studied abit more. then later we went to ikea for a late lunch. went to queensway on the way for jerome to go get a bag for cambodia. "MY HIT-O-METER IS RINGING!!" LOL! after that we then went to ikea. ate super alot. the meatballs are just fantastic! played PS2 with my brother to catch up as well. gonna study chinese AGAIN soon before daddy's birthday dinner! ciaos!:D

just had a major blow out with my entire family...

gonna get my new specs on sunday! :)

Today had class outing at VIVO! my 2nd time at vivo. joel, alden & i went there early so we went to candy empire and we shared a turkish delight. it was super duper niceee!!! the jelly inside the chocolate was super sweet. then we walked around. saw many cool stuff like that orange lambo & some other cool stuff like zara. after that we met sophia, qilin, khai dan, dominic, kitmun, christabel. maple came abit later. we played with the balloon while waiting for the movie to start. we then went to buy the popcorn etc. i bought nachos!! caught at worlds end! it was quite nice.. but the ending was quite sad. arghhh chinese o levels in 3 days time, gotta practice practice practice hard. gonna study chinese later after the 7 o clock show. having a pretty bad flu now, i KNOW i'll be healed :D

meet the parents went quite okay. in the end, my mum and i did not go see the principal as she had to go to work. went for chinese class abit. i can see that my chinese is improving! :D

one touch of Your glory, Jesus one touch of Your glory.

thanks mr chia!(in advance) you're gonna spoil my day tomorrow. now thanks to this beloved teacher of mine, i am told i have to see ms lim tomorrow during meet the parents. but i don't get it, i got 6th in class & i have to see the principal but why those who got lower grades don't have to go. i'm not even in S2E la.. this is kind of puzzling. anyway lets hope that mr chia is wrong. anyway today's chinese sprint thingyy was kind of useless. it was rather slacky. the first half was going on quite well but after the break, the whole class just started to get super restless & i failed to pay attention after that! o level chinese in4 days time! i'm quite sure i can get a b4 & above. but i aim is to get a2 which is quite difficult esp with those few practices i am doing now. i also gotta start on my d&t folio.. it's taking up SO SO Much time! oh ya mr chia comfirm scold me about my folio tomorrow.. nothing much to look forward too except for that class outing on friday.. but there is chinese o levels so soon how to go out in peace??

hah! today's been okay. school's been pretty empty. in fact, with the sec4s & sec5s only it's almost practically empty. the ambience is rather cool though. never felt that way in school before. anyway, tomorrow there is chinese sprint sessions! wa, like almost 5 hours of pure chinese. i pray i won't get distracted. life's been pretty smooth sailing & my walk with Christ is getting stronger. however my results are just super crappy but i'm not in s2e, which is quite bad cause i sure won't have enough discipline. i'll leave that to God to fill me with discipline & wisdom to manage my time well during the holidays! :D

under the guise of someone else :(

God is great!

freaking pissed.. failed my history mid years, very sad. at least now i'm much closer to God, which is actually eveerythingg. i put studies toooo high up in my life already! should set my piorirties right & everything will fall into place.sometimes i look around i see my friends doing better than me i guess i feel kind of jealous in a way. anyway o levels in a few months time. gonna start studying beffore its toooo late!! :D

kryptonie... :D

great time for the world to come crashing.




relient k-who i am hates who i've been

cause i am hanging on every word you say, even if you don't wanna speak tonight, thats alright, alright with me.