All those nights

Yea, I've been studying more of late so thank God for that. I know it's not the best I can do though, there's so much more I can do so I'll stop blogging here and start studying now!

Mondays.

My room is in a total mess as of now! There's like papers and stuff everywhere. I have to clear them up asap. Well, exams are coming in a matter of days and I'm only prepared for like half of them which brings me to something called literature. There's a reason why I didn't take literature in secondary school but now it's a compulsory subject so I'm stuck with it! Literature is just so complicated. You have to think in so deeply, explore every possibility. It's so exhausting!

Did I mention that my hard drive has crashed? It like makes this weird noise when I plug it in. I've given up trying to fix it. Hopefully it'll fix itself like it did the last time. Wow, I'm going back to Singapore so so soon. I'm really starting to look forward to it. It's gonna be so nice returning to familiar territory, back to family, friends and good food. Hah, when I'm back in Singapore I'm gonna switch to start using mac! It's quite cool. Oh and now my mac is full of pictures of ppl camwhoring. Maybe I'll upload some next time. Haha.

When I look back 1 year ago I go like wow, so much has changed..

nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Hey! It's always nice to go to church. It's like even though I may not absorb 100% of what is taught I always manage to leave feeling nice. God is really so amazing. How can someone hold so much grace? I mean it's not easy to forgive but God forgives everything. Amazing huh.

Oh well, you know there has been this strange rashes on my neck and it's very very irritating. God please take it away?!?!?! PLEASE?? :):):)

There's so much I have to commit to God but I just don't. I know it's bad but God isn't like the number 1 priority in my life? Like when something happens the first thing that would come to my mind is how to solve it, not to commit it to God. Bad bad bad. Another thing about me is that I'm so ungrateful towards God. I take him for granted so so much. When He solves my problems I go hallelujah and after that in my heart I go whatever. The best/worst part is that His love for us will never change. Amazing!

I enjoy being in a small church. It's like everyone knows each other and you can feel that everyone is tightly knit together. Of course being in a big church is good too but oh well, just my personal preference.

HAHAHAHA, to Alden, Alex, Grace & JC!!! CELIBACY FTW!!!!!!! :D:D

Smile

Hey! Pray for me? Yea pray for my studies k? I seriously need all the prayer I can get.

Anyway church was pretty good today. Yeap, that's all for now.

Amber pacific

Ahhh, Math 1 seriously sucks! I have so much to catch up with. This really sucks, I'm like gonna pay attention in all lectures from now on. Most of the time it's not that I don't wanna listen in lecture but it's just that I keep falling asleep. I guess you could relate that to a lack of discipline. Oh well, I'm pretty lost in Math 1. There's Chemistry lecture later and it the Chemistry lectures seriously suck. It's like you can't help but fall asleep. Even mints can't keep you awake there.

Well, at least there's OCF to look forward to later. OCF is like this weekly church bible study thing. That's one thing to look forward to. Which reminds me, I've yet to prepare for bible study later. Haha, it's always nice to know that Grace is undeserved. I mean it's times when life is like crap where you see yourself for who you are really are.

Back to studies, I really have to start working hard. I'm not good at humanities and here I am taking so many of them. I have History of Ideas, English which consists of literature and some other crap. There's drama also! OH SHUCKSS, I screwed up my mime yesterday. I only got 7.5/10 and everyone else got like 8+, some even 9. Luckily it's not graded this time. Next time I'll prepare harder.

You know, I've sort of forgotten what it's like to be in Singapore already. I've grown so accustomed to the life over here. Can't wait to go back to Singapore though!

Overrated

Ok I know I haven't really been updating much these past few days. Life's been pretty busy, I can never find the time to blog. There hasn't been much inspiration to blog either, I mean I used to be able to blog about my day but it's like routine now and I can't blog about it everyday right? Yea, it's not a bad routine. I'm actually enjoying myself here. I've been slacking off abit too much recently though. Haven't really been on my books. Ironically Math 2 is easier than Math 1. Math 1 contains 'O' Level stuff which I have completely forgotten about! Wow, trigonometry can be such a bitch. Haha, oh well. Exams are coming really really soon. My first paper is on the 4th of April and it's Math 1!! I'll be coming back really soon again, like on the 10th of April.

There's so much stuff I want to do when I'm back in Singapore! I do miss home cooked food so so much. I used to be like it's the same thing everyday but here I am craving for it now. Life is seriously full of irony. You know they say the grass is always greener on the other side? I have to agree with that.

I do miss playing soccer! It's been like 2-3 weeks since I've last played soccer. Hopefully the game this Saturday is still on. Can't wait to get back to Singapore to play though, I really miss playing there.

My walk with God as usual hasn't been that great but I'm trying. Yea, that's all for today! Seeya!

?

I hate those mornings when you wake up and feel like wtf. Yea, I guess today can be counted as one of those days. No idea why though but I did have a strange dream. Let's see, the past week is so hard to describe but I'll try to describe it in a few words. I think that this week has been pretty crazy. Crazy in a good way though.

Yea, school has been fine. The workload here is pretty acceptable and I'm coping well.

Stolen

What a day.

Saturday

Alright, I know that I haven't been updating regularly but that's cause I've been so busy with work and stuff. I don't know, it always seems like I can't find time to blog.

Anyway, school finally started on Monday. I chose Chemistry, Math 1 and Math 2. The way English works here is quite cool. They like separate it into 2 different sections namely Drama and Literature. It's really different from Singapore's system. There's also English for Academic Purposes (EAP) and History of Ideas (HOI). If I have to choose one subject that I really dislike it would be HOI. It's abit like History back in Singapore. Oh well, you know what I've been learning in Maths is seriously so weird. 2 + 3 = 5 right? Not anymore, it can equal to 2 or some crap like that. It's all new to me so yea, there's alot of catching up to do. It still doesn't really feel like school though, it's a new experience for me.

The past few days have been so so cold and it's authum only. Oh yea, cold is ok just that when it rains it tends to get really uncomfortable. I don't know I'm enjoying myself here but I'm missing Singapore.

post about what

Hi

The weather outside is quite cold right now. Not tonight. It's getting colder though. But they say that tomorrow is going to be real hot.

Let me tell you a secret

I, Lincoln Tan don't know how to work Facebook!
I, Lincoln Tan, was an ah bengzxz! But I guess I'm better now that I have come to Australia and witnessed True Coolness in the form of someone really really cool (hahaha no duh)
I, Lincoln Tan, still love Westlife, especially sappy love ballads that make human beings keel over and start puking their insides out due to pure and unadulterated grossness
On the other hand, they used to be cool. Used to. One of them is gay.

On a more serious note, I am studying Chemistry now. Protons are positive and Electrons are negative.

In Your Freedom

Haha, yesterday was great. For me personally it's almost impossible to stay positive for like more than a few hours. I don't know but it's like after a few hours of positiveness all the negative thoughts just set in.

Oh wells, lecutres have started to get slightly boring. Maybe it's cause they're currently teaching what I've learnt from the extended program already. Sometimes I could just fall asleep during lectures! I hope that this things don't continue this way. On a much brighter note, my life for this past few days have been so full of God's love. I remember there was one night I was so happy that I was so scared that the next day I wouldn't be happy which turned out to be the case after I had a sad dream but things became happy again after that.

You know how everyone has an escape in life? For some it may be exercising or maybe even doing drugs or something. I guess my form of escape would be in music. The music I listen to really affects my mood. I haven't really been listening to Christian music for the past month and when I started listening again, I really felt good.

Alright, I'll be off to do work now. Nothing much to blog about these days.

Adonai

I know this makes me sound like a total jackass but it's only at the low points in my life that I turn to Jesus. It's always at the low points in life where I see how I can't make it without God. Woohoo, I feel like I'm high on Jesus. Haha, it's really so amazing how God can turn any situation into a great situation. My spiritual life is like this cycle, when shit happens I turn to Him and when things are good I forget. That's a really screwed up habit and I hope this time it's different.

When I first came here I was so on fire for Christ then slowly the fire just died out a few weeks later. When you feel the fire of God it really feels so different. Ever since the fire for God died out it's like I've been trying to find my peace in everything else but Jesus. Weird right? Just a few minutes ago in my mind was like, life sucks and now I feel like my life is perfect. Ok, I must sound crazy now but that's really how good the love of God is. I seriously forgot what God's love felt like! The way I'm feeling now is insane. I'm feeling at peace, happy, no negative feelings at all. I wasn't even praying but I just started playing Hillsongs and I could feel the difference. Wow, this is really so so amazing. I'll blog more tomorrow! =]

?

Yay! Lectures have started at last. I sort of don't really like lectures as compared to classrooms cause I'll tend to fall asleep after awhile. Oh well, yesterday was a pretty long day. Played soccer after class yesterday and it was quite fun I guess. There's like no tutorials on the first week of school just like Poly last time.

I'm really thankful for the friends I've made here.

Mr. Positive

I'm back. Didn't really feel like blogging here cause I got this diary where I write in it everyday and it's there where I can say how I really really feel. Well, today was sort of a long day but I won't blog much about it.

In my life I'm just too negative. You know that in all that I do, I'll always assume that the worst case would happen so that I won't get affected by it too badly if the worst does happens. It's like I'm hoping for the best but expecting the worst. This mindset has sort of made me a more negative person so from now I'll really change it. I'm gonna start afresh. I'm gonna start each day thanking God for this day He has blessed me with. I'm gonna be thankful for everything that has brought me happiness. I'm not gonna be emo when shit happens. When shit happens, I'll thank God that for his faithfulness that will bring me through it. That's who I wanna be. This negativity has in a way caused me to be less happy. I was talking to this friend the other day and that friend managed to put how I feel in a phrase "You're just unable to fully embrace happiness." Yea, I totally agree with what she said.

This might sound abit weird and stuff but I really just wanna thank God for blessing Darren in my life. If I really stop being so negative, I'll thank him cause he is sort of like this catalyst that made me see how bad it was.

Can't wait for school to start, I know this year is gonna be a different year and I really look forward to what is to come. Chose my electives already, Chemistry, Maths 1 and Maths 2. Thank God for guidance that he's blessed me with through others.

Oh yea, you know the people here are really nice. In my 1 month plus here, I've talked to more strangers here than during my 17 years in Singapore. I was like taking this walk yesterday night, and a group of people came up and asked me if I was depressed and we ended up talking for awhile. Haha, it feels good when you're in a friendlier environment for many obvious reasons. My MSN has some weird problem now which doesn't seem to be going away.

The beauty of every problem is that there will be a solution.

Goodbye for now

This blog is gonna be dead for awhile, I'm not sure how long. Gonna take some time away from this place.

Dancing ducks????

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!

Breakeven

Today was the introductory lectures for various subjects. Went for those that I felt that I should go. The lectures here are similar to Poly which means I'll have to have more discipline and not slack off. Played soccer after the lectures and as usual we lost like crap.. We've been losing every team we have played against. Anyway I sort of found my ideal position today which is good thing.

The song Cannonball by Damien Rice is really really meaningful. I remember when I first got the song a few years ago I was like listening to it on repeat for like forever. It's a really beautiful song that really connects to how I feel/felt. Haha, I seriously need to play more soccer or do some physical activity. Tomorrow I think I'm just gonna waste my day away.

I'm really worried that when the main term starts I won't be putting in effort into my studies. There's like this insane pressure on me to do well here. It's not pressure from my mum or what but it's just that I really feel the need to do well.

Shit, this is damn crazy..

Suppose?

I won't be updating today. Haha, don't really have the mood.

Again I go unnoticed

Well, had fun today. After touching down, headed straight back home to put my stuff down before heading out with the guys to city. Went to Melbourne Central to get some stuff. Then we wasted the afternoon at Yarra River and Crown. Took some photos but the internet here is sucky to the point where I'll take a long time to upload them so I'll save them for another day.

Nothing much I wanna blog about today but today was sort of a good day, catching up with everyone and all.

Welcome to my life

Ok, this past few days have been great! Sadly, all good things must come to an end. This 5 days feels so short. Well, spent most of my time with my family today which was great. Let's see, I don't have much time to blog so I'll make this a short one. Went for lunch with my family, then went to collect my permanent lenses. Then my uncle gave a very special wallet. Haha, went to Jerome's house after that to pass him back his guitar. Jerome, thanks for lending me your guitar the past few days. His guitar is very special, sometimes it sounds super nice while other times it sounds hollow. Weird right?

It sucks to leave, but that's life. I'm just gonna go where it takes me.